His Heart

Singing with Daddy!

2011-11-21T22:02:00.003-05:00

I won't apologize for not posting until now. It would be futile. Some things are too good to pass up, though, so here is a short clip for your viewing pleasure! C.T.C. is showing some good rhythm here (LOVE the head! Ha!), and D.T. is certain he will be a singer someday! ;o)

Enjoy the Christmas spirit...! ;o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

"Not Me! Monday!" Returns!!!

2011-11-07T11:00:00.007-05:00

Welcome back to "Not me" Monday... and my blog. Please remember to stop by MckMama's place to see what everyone else has not been up to this week. ;o)

I was not super excited when I saw MckMama's post on facebook with a NMM post! I did not used to love to participate in this little bit of fun, so I was not ready to hop back on the bandwagon! It is not the first thing I have posted in a long time, other than cop-out videos of our son's latest achievements. LOL! ;o)

I am not writing this in the tub as our son naps in the next room.

I am not having a really bad case of writer's block or mama brain and I do not think I have lost my bloggy touch. :-/

Our son is not 7 months old today, and I have not still neglected to write his 3-6 month update! What's up with that? He did not also begin to army crawl today!!! It is not time to BABY PROOF!!! Yikes! ;o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

GROWL!!! ;o)

2011-10-15T17:53:00.001-04:00

His newest sound... ;o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Spin!

2011-10-15T17:49:00.002-04:00

Can you tell which toy is his favorite??? ;o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Rolling over ~ Part Deux! ;o)

2011-10-05T13:09:00.002-04:00

Well, I may be a bit overexcited in this video... but I was so happy to finally catch our little man in action on VIDEO!!! I've tried faaaaar too many times... now, finally... SUCCESS... for him + ME!!!!! ;o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Squeal! ;o)

2011-09-26T12:28:00.000-04:00

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Peek-A-Boo!

2011-09-23T21:31:00.001-04:00

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Pink Panther Laughter!

2011-09-22T21:08:00.002-04:00

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Teething & Talking...

2011-09-20T12:24:00.001-04:00

Very often, recently, C.T.C. can be found soothing his teeth on his Exersaucer toys and showing off his newly found voice... ;o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Got milk?

2011-09-17T09:40:00.016-04:00

A month ago. I did not realize how long it had been. I just knew it had been awhile. Well, looking back through all my Facebook messages (come on, tell me that's not how you figure things out, too!) I realized that it was exactly one month ago, today, when someone first offered me milk for our son.

We had struggled for months with, first, a liquid formula (this was already his third formula by the time he came to us!) and then a lactose-free formula, which worked better than the others, but still not well enough. If he threw up once a feeding, he threw up five or six times each feeding. It wasn't just a little, either. It was close to at least half of every feeding, if you added it all up. When he stopped gaining sufficient weight (only five ounces in one month!), the doctor became concerned and prescribed Z@nt@c for acid reflux. It didn't really seem to make a difference, though, so that was short lived until the doctor said we could stop. Thank goodness. I really don't like having to give him medication.

Now, though, we had this other opportunity in front of us. It didn't exactly sound strange to me, but I wondered if it was okay. So, we called the pediatrician for clearance, and then marched forward quickly with what God had provided. It is interesting just how much C.T.C. liked her milk. I mean, REALLY liked it! I recall one time when I gave him the bottle, he immediately exhaled with a deep sigh and a long "mmmmmmm....!" It felt good for this mama's heart to feel his satisfaction in place of all his previous discomfort.

As the days passed, we continued to get milk, but now, it was more like five or six different mothers making the donations Five or six mothers with five or six of their own little ones to feed. Five or six mothers who endured my probing examinations of... do you smoke? do you drink? do you take drugs? are you healthy? what prescription medications do you take? what is your diet like?

I must admit. Even though I was incredibly grateful for these wonderful gifts, and even though I rested in our son's obvious pleasure, I felt guilty, too. I have a natural tendency in my personality to feel this way, and it is something I am working on, but nevertheless, I felt bad about taking from another mother. Another child. Anyone, really, when I was not doing my part. I know, I know. I hadn't been pregnant. So, how in the world could I produce milk for my own son? I felt helpless and insufficient. I read a bit (okay, a LOT!) about other adoptive mothers who had successfully deceived their bodies into producing milk for their children. Maybe I could too, I thought! I even called a lactation consultant to come over to our home for a meeting. She was very positive about the potential and gave me all the information I would need to present to my doctor to get started. Prescriptions I would need for him to write. Our plan of action. So, off I went, typed proposal in hand, and a determined mindset to do whatever I could. FAIL! The doctor actually took a LONG time to come in to the examination room, and I wondered why in the world they were so far behind. Come to find out, the nurse who came in to ask me all the prerequisite questions, took the proposal I gave her and handed it over to him to read. Then, he and his partner (neither of whom had ever heard of such a thing as adoptive lactation!) began to research. When he finally came in to our appointment, he told me that, as a doctor, he prides himself on knowing his field very well. However, neither he nor his colleague were able to find even one peer-reviewed (read: GOLD standard of science!) article in all their medical journals documenting what I wanted to do or its potential success or failure. Beyond that, the medication I was asking him to prescribe for me was not FDA approved. It really didn't matter that it is approved in every other country in the world, because it it not approved in America. It really didn't matter that he could write me a prescription that I could fill in C@nada, because that could cost him his medical license and was something he was unwilling to do. Point noted. Shot down. Truly, I was disappointed, but I reminded myself that I asked God to please accomplish His will through this appointment, even if it might turn out to be the opposite of what I hoped. I guess that's exactly what happened, and God answered my prayer. Why isn't it easier to accept God's will when we have other ideas in our minds? I guess the same could be said for my willingness to trust Him on a daily (sometimes hourly) basis to provide for my son's food. Many days, I knew there was not enough milk left for the next day. Sometimes, I knew there was not even enough left for the next feeding. Of course, I had formula, and I could not... would not let him starve. It's just that I felt so... um... guilty for giving him what I knew was not the best thing for him. I remember one time when I literally did not have any more milk to give him, so I mixed up a bottle of formula... only to have him throw up more than half of it all over himself, me, and the floor. Then, there were all the text messages. Do you have milk? Do you have milk? Do you have milk? I've become a lot more bold as an advocate for my son. Followed up with car rides all over the city to pick up whatever was available. Even if it was only enough for one or two feedings. Talk about trusting God for daily bread. I have been blessed, though, through the entire experience so far. Yikes. So far. Because it's not over yet, and I wonder if God thinks I get it yet. I keep thinking I've learned my lesson, only to be faced with yet another extension of the same lesson. Over and over again. Trust ME! Yes, LORD, I am trying. I will trust You and ask that You continue to guide our steps.

So, I have laid down the idea of trying to make milk myself for our son. We are gratefully accepting milk from several healthy, gracious mothers, and I have made countless new friends. We are watching him fill out a bit... still not as much as we would like, but he is oh, so much better than before. He is back up from the 10th percentile to the 25th, and he is a very happy baby.

You know, it is interesting how God's provision is always right on time... the first and most consistent donor we have had is moving away this week, and God has already provided us with another very generous young woman to come alongside us. She gave us 200 ounces last evening, and plans to continue to give to us on a regular basis. I cannot adequately express to you what a relief it is to have a freezer full...

...and to not have to pursue that next bottle. Hey, maybe God thinks I have finally learned the trust lesson well enough... I guess we'll see. Thank you, LORD, for always providing in our moment of need!

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

iPhones and Blessings!

2011-09-16T09:01:00.003-04:00

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

A Laugh? or a Hiccup? ;o)

2011-09-09T20:13:00.000-04:00

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Being Selective...

2011-09-09T14:23:00.004-04:00

It's not much, but here is a short, little video of our little guy! I LOVE how he is already exerting his preferences by removing all the toys except his favorite, the green musical fish! He is pretty good at finding the button that makes the fish sing... ;o)

Enjoy!

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Never say never...

2011-08-10T14:57:00.006-04:00

There are a couple of things that I said I would never do concerning my son... or at least I hoped I would not have to do.

1. ~~Put him on a medication like Zantac that could have negative side effects~~
2. ~~Wake him up to feed him~~

Well, never say never because I guess both of those are on the table, now.

We went to the pediatrician yesterday for C.T.C.'s four month check -up, hoping that he had gained a healthy amount of weight. The last time we had been there, he had, unfortunately, slipped on his weight percentile from the 50th down to the 25th. Concerning? Perhaps, except that he had gone up on his height percentile from the 50th to the 75th. An argument could be made that he had simply stretched out. Laying him on the scale, though, I could quickly see that it was not to be. Only 5 more ounces in almost a month. Not even 13 pounds at four months of age. It seemed a bit low to me, and the doctor confirmed my suspicions and her concern. The last time, it was a signal to watch and see, but now, it was a pattern. He was no longer sustaining his level of growth. He had fallen off his curve, and something had to be done. Her previous opinion on medication was that she did not prefer to "mess with the gut floor" on infants. I know that many other physicians are quick to prescribe, but she liked to try whatever else was possible first in order to preserve a baby's stomach acid, which is necessary to manage bad bacteria. However, at this point, she said that because of his struggle to gain weight, we had no choice. What is a mother to do? Take a big breath, pray that God will protect my son from any ill side effects, and pick up the prescription. So, now, my son is on Z@nt@c twice a day and eating no more than five ounces at once (because he was not keeping down greater amounts) 6-7 times a day. I'm pushing for seven, but do you know how tough that is when he has been sleeping through the night since the age of five or six weeks? [SO grateful!!! :o)] There aren't that many hours left in the day. Even the doctor said she couldn't believe she was going to tell me to do this. I mean, wake up a sleeping baby???? She said I could just give him his first feeding the second we got up in the morning, but even that doesn't really leave enough time for every 3 hours, and he needs EVERY calorie he can get! Fortunately, he woke up on his own at 4 a.m.

He must have known it was time for him to eat. Oh, and I didn't tell you where he is at this point, did I? Yeah. That would be the 10th percentile. As in, T-E-N-T-H. When he came to us, he was in the 90-something percentile.

90th... and a chin! ;o)

Then, steadily in the 50th. Then, last time in the 25th, and now in the 10th.

10th and not an ounce of fat on him! :o(

We are giving him all the nutrition we can, but he's just not keeping it down. :o( So, we are just following the doctor's recommendations and trusting that God will help his little body to grow! You know, I thought we had learned enough about trusting just waiting for him. I didn't realize I would have this many more opportunities to learn about trusting God, now! ;o) Actually, last night was a very pleasant evening. After giving him his first dose of medication, it was the first time I can EVER remember that we were able to use a regular sized burp cloth instead of a blanket. He did not throw up even once in three feedings, and he was quite relaxed. I even felt a twinge of regret that we had not asked the doctor to reconsider doing this sooner. I mean, he seemed to feel so much better. So, that's our update. It didn't come out exactly the way I said it to myself as I was falling back asleep after feeding him this morning, but... oh, well... it's done! :0)

So, that's it.

4 feedings down.
NO throwing up for 3.
Minimal spitting up for 1. So, that's what you call spitting up??? ;o)
3 feedings to go for the day.
Weight check in 3 weeks.

Please keep praying!

Jump back on your curve, baby! ;o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Sleep!

2011-08-03T21:09:00.001-04:00

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Smile!

2011-08-03T17:39:00.001-04:00

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Daddy's Little Soccer Player! :o)

2011-07-30T18:57:00.001-04:00

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

It's a lip, lip, lip! ;o)

2011-07-30T18:51:00.004-04:00

CTC has discovered his mouth...

...and begun to contort his lips in strange ways!

How funny! ;o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

The 1st Three Months!

2011-07-29T20:23:00.017-04:00

Well son, I am not sure if your Mama's brain is going to remember everything, but here goes! You are growing SO much! The first few weeks were hard because your tummy did not like the formula we were told to give you. About 15 minutes after you would eat each time, you would cry for a very long time, and we knew that you were in pain. After a couple of visits to the doctor, we convinced them that you needed a new formula (your FOURTH one!), and they agreed that we should try one called Nutramigen. We are grateful to God for all the scientists who know how to do things like take the dairy proteins out of formula so that little babies like you won't get sick. You do much better now! Except for the spitting up. Ha! You do A LOT of that! It keeps you trim and slim for sure. You DO like to eat, though! You let us know every time you are hungry, and that is more often all the time. Maybe that is because you lose so much from every feeding. We have finally settled on 5 ounces in your bottle, and you ask for that every 2 - 3 hours. It is better than giving you more, though, because your tummy just won't keep it down. We can't wait to see how much weight you have gained at your next checkup. When you were born, your weight was 7 pounds, 9 ounces, and at the last visit to the doctors, you weighed 12 pounds, 8 ounces. That makes you bigger than 25% of the other babies out there. It is good, though, because we hope that you won't struggle with weight like Mama and Daddy. You are tall, too! You were 24.5 inches at your last doctor's visit, and that makes you taller than 75% of all the other babies out there! WOW! You will definitely be taller than Mama and Daddy! :o)

You have been smiling for a long time now. We love to see you smile, and recently, we have loved to hear you laugh! One day, I even heard you laugh in your sleep. That made me smile because I knew you were having pleasant dreams. You like the different things we say to you, and the different songs we sing. "Bella," as we call your Grandma, taught you the words "uh-oh" and you try very hard to imitate those sounds. You are getting close! You like to hear the rhymes "Pat-a-cake" and the "Itsy Bitsy Spider." You also like to hear the "A-B-C song," "Jesus Loves Me," and any other song we can think of. You like for us to get creative, and you don't really like to hear a song or rhyme for more than a day or two. We know that you are bored and want us to find something new when you stop smiling. It can be rather challenging! ;o) You LOVE the Praise Baby DVDs we got for you at the Christian book store. You try to sing along, and Daddy is happy about that! You especially like the songs "I Could Sing of Your Love Forever" and "Holy, Holy, Holy!" :o) Your grandmother, Mamaie, can't wait to hear you sing, too! You see her when Daddy talks to her on Skype, and you will meet her next year when we travel with you to Romania where your Daddy grew up!

The doctor says that you are very healthy. When you first came to us, your eye watered a lot, but I noticed the other week that it wasn't doing that anymore. Now, we just need to get your tummy settled down. We do give you some things in your bottle twice a day that make you feel some better. They are aloe, probiotics, and omega-3 fish oil. Such a yummy cocktail! We are also taking you to the chiropractor each week to help your body stay all relaxed and straightened out! You like him a lot, and he makes you feel better! :o)

You are quite the sleeper at night, son! You have been sleeping the WHOLE NIGHT since you were about 5 or six weeks old! Mama and Daddy are VERY thankful for that. For a few weeks, you were rather fussy in the evenings, but your sleeping through the nights helped us to get through that. Now, you are not as fussy at night anymore.

You do not sleep quite as well during the day. I guess that is smart, huh? Days are for doing things, and nights are for sleeping, right? ;o) Most times, you will wake up from your nap after 15 minutes or half an hour. If we lay down with you in the guest bed, though, you will sleep for 2 or 3 hours. I guess you just like to be with us. Plus, you like to sleep on your stomach, and you can do that if we are there to watch you, but not if you are by yourself. Grandpap discovered how much you like this, and taught us. He could get you to sleep better than all of us! :o)

You do not like to have a pacifier. We tried those with you several times when you first came to be with us, but you always spit it out. Who wants plastic in their mouth, anyway, right? ;o) You have found your thumb, though, and we think that it is good for you to have a way to soothe yourself! The only thing is that you chew on it more than suck. Maybe you are preparing to get some teeth??? :o)

You like baths, but you do not play in the tub yet. We can't wait until you do! :o) In the meantime, your big sister Goldie thinks it is her job to personally give you a bath! Maybe she thinks you are one of her puppies. LOL! ;o) Your big brother, Benjamin likes to sit quietly next to you and protect you. :o)

You like the swing our friends gave us for you. It is a good place to sit so that Mama can cook dinner or do the laundry, but really, you would rather be held. Mama likes to hold you, too, but sometimes, she needs to get things done. She doesn't get a bath very often anymore because you usually wake up from your nap when she tries. Hopefully, things will get a little better as you get older. :o)

You have a nice new crib, now, that we brought home a few weeks ago. Before that, you were sleeping in a bassinet, but then you were getting a little bit too big for that. Sadly, the crib has a little boo-boo on the top and we have to get a new piece to replace it. Then, your room will be almost done. It is still set up for guests to come visit us, too, and we like that because all our friends are so important to us and you. All of them were so excited and welcomed you with lots of gifts and many, many kisses! We were able to get your crib because of them, and you were also given A LOT of clothes! Now, the only thing left to do in your room is to paint your initials for the wall above your bed and the meanings of your names from the Bible, God's Word! You have three names plus our last name. Wow! 22 letters! You will know almost the WHOLE alphabet when you learn your names! ;o) Your first name was given to you by your birth mother, and we like it very much because it came from the Bible. We love her very much, and we hope that you will love her, too, and learn to know her as you grow. You have two middle names hyphenated together. They are each from your grandfathers because we love them very much and we want you to always remember them. We also have the changing table that was Mama's when she was a baby. Daddy's brother came to visit the other year, and he helped to paint the table to make it special for you! He even hand-painted the words Joy, Hope, and Peace on the drawers because those words were special to Mama while we waited for you. Don't ever forget, son, that God will give us His Joy, Hope, and Peace every day of our lives, if we ask Him. We pray that He will draw you to Himself early in your life, and that you will respond to Him and that you will not resist Him. He loves you and He died for you. We pray that you will choose to follow Him.

Well, it is late, and I can't think of anything else right now. We love you, and we are grateful to God for choosing us to be your Mama and Daddy! Sleep well!

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Where it all fits.

2011-07-29T12:05:00.004-04:00

It has been a long time since I have visited this, what was my second home for such a long time. Part of me misses it, and part of me doesn't give it a second thought. This was my go to place to get my thoughts out, to vent, and to meet others. Now, I find myself not needing it anymore, although I LOVE what I have gained from our time together. We'll see if I continue to post anything, perhaps with new intentions, but at least I have recorded my journey this far. It is always good to look back.

I have a rare moment right now. The baby is asleep, although I cannot vouch for how long that will last. When he cries, it is difficult for me to not go to him immediately because I am concerned that we should not have any attachment issues. I think I am probably over-responding and causing him to want to be held all.the.time! LOL! ;o)

The dogs are quiet downstairs after the baby and I walked them for about 15 minutes. That is more exercise than they have seen in awhile. The walks have to happen early if they are to happen at all in these temperatures.

The class website is down, so I am unable to do any assignments. Poor me. Oh well. [hear the sarcasm!]

Our transition is going fairly well. It has its ups and downs, mostly connected to my mood. I love being a mother. I love my son. I love my husband. It's just this life being so totally different thing that gets to me at times. It's like everything is upside down, inside out, and backwards. I think about our life four months ago. We knew nothing about anything. Life was its normal 15-year married routine. Just the two of us. As much as I love this, I miss that, too. We had given up our pursuit when God decided to move. Now, life has changed in an instant. We don't drive in to work together anymore. I don't go in to work at all. We don't grocery shop just the two of us anymore. Sometimes, we don't even grocery shop with the three of us. It's more like one or the other of us grocery shops alone. I miss shopping together. We are trying to learn how to make it all work with our new normal, and it is coming along.

I LOVE this picture of the three of us together!

We pulled out the Wii last night while the baby slept behind us in his swing. Even though we hadn't gotten on it in a very long time, it felt a little like normal to me. Oh, and I have lost 6.6 pounds, according to the Wii, since the adoption. This is a good thing, and one I am still fighting to continue. I have not forgotten my old goals. This last week, we stopped at the store together to get just one or two things. Not a big trip, but it felt a bit like normal to me. A new normal. I don't even know why I am sharing all this because I don't want you to think I am ungrateful. I feel so blessed by this gift God has given us. With what He has entrusted to our care. I just need to figure out who I am again. Nothing is the same. A few months ago, we went to work together everyday. We came home from work together everyday. We went shopping together. We traveled together. Every day was the same, as annoying as it could be. Every day was the same, as wonderful as it could be. I miss that.

Well, I hope this wasn't a downer. I just needed to get it out like I used to. If there is anything I have learned in counseling, it is the importance of getting it out.

There is lots more I could say, but I will end with two things.

1. Who am I now?

A wife, mother, daughter and friend. A bad cook who is trying to get better. A former employee. A child of God. Still trying to figure it all out and not lose my identity!

2. A few of my favorite pictures! :o)

A morning out with friends did us a world of good! I am convinced that these two would make a great husband and wife someday. Wouldn't their children be BEAUTIFUL?!?!?!? YES, I am a matchmaker! See... they are looking at each other and everything! Ha! ;o)

My new (to me) chair. Sometimes, I like it, and sometimes, I don't. :o)

Daddy and CTC at church.
Praying that God will draw our son to Himself at an early age.
Sharing the blessing of music that God has given to D.T.

Well, I guess that's about it for now. Until the next time...

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Pooh...

2011-07-07T09:45:00.002-04:00

Well, it has been close to three months since I just about dropped off the face of the earth! With good reason, of course. I won't promise I will be better about posting because I am not sure if I will or will not. However, I will try. In the meantime, check out this ~~little~~ big guy.

I think there are a few possibilities for what is going on in this video:

1. His hands taste fabulous, but are too big to fit in his mouth! Ha!
2. He has a lot to say to Pooh and Tigger! :o)
3. He is ravenously hungry after just waking up!

Ding, ding, ding... I think we have a winner in #3! ;o)

Oh, and I know I have not posted my voice clips. It was a great idea. Unfortunately, the software to convert it is not working for me. I guess my thoughts will have to stay inside my head. :o(

Enjoy CTC!!! :o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Does it work???

2011-06-15T14:29:00.006-04:00

Tell me what you think! Then, I can upload some of my other longer ones! :o)

Goodness! I sound kind of sad in this recording, but please don't be fooled! I'm not sad. I'm just tired. Really, really tired! Ha! ;o)

More to come, but I have to convert all of them to movies, so give me a bit of time! :o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Long time, no chat...

2011-06-14T08:40:00.005-04:00

It has obviously been a long time since I have posted. I pray that God will give me clarity because there is so much I want to say, yet nothing I want to say. It may be a bit choppy.

C.T.C is doing well. He likes his new formula, and it agrees with him significantly more than the others did. His 2 month check-up is scheduled (just a tad bit late) for next Monday. According to my scale at home, I believe he is a bit more than 12 pounds. Growing boy!!! :o)

We are adjusting to our new normal, and we love it. I must admit, though, it is very hard! You all knew that, though, didn't you? ;o) It is quite an adjustment, that is for sure, and that is what I want to share with you in this post. God gave me a wonderful opportunity the other week. I took our son to meet a former professor who was familiar with our story. It was so neat how God orchestrated everything. I chatted online with the professor for a minute or two the night before to check his office hours, and he told me that he would be there after 1 p.m. So, after 1 p.m., I stopped by and he was not there. Then, I stopped by a second time later, and he was still not there. I was disappointed but figured that something must have come up. So, I later stopped by one final time, and was so excited to find him there! We chatted a bit, and towards the end of our conversation, he started asking me some questions that I found a bit strange. I knew there was something "to them." Then, he told me that he was currently teaching an intensive class (the one I dropped when we found out about our son) and was looking for someone to assist him with some role plays. He asked me if I was interested. He would be the counselor, and I would be the counselee. I was so excited, and eagerly accepted, but asked him why he asked ME. Then, he shared that he had just prayed that God would direct him to the person he should ask, and then I had immediately arrived at his door. I thought it was so neat that I had tried unsuccessfully to see him twice earlier, but found him there, just after he had prayed. If I had found him earlier, he would not have just prayed. How like God! Amazing!!! :o)

I should stop going on like this and just get to the point, or my son will wake up and end this post quickly. I am trying to let go of my perfectionism.

So, here's the story. I spent 3 mornings doing role plays with my professor for his class, and it was so beneficial to me, as my husband and I adjust to our new roles as parents. Two interesting things. My professor noted that my mind is overwhelmed by multi-tasking. Imagine that! It was also evidenced by him asking me a question and then me immediately forgetting what he had just asked me. Picture it. Sitting in front of 100+ students and my brain just totally shuts down! Ha!

Among other things, my professor suggested some ways of coping. One thing he said about me is that he finds me creative. I thought that was a little odd, but I can see the point that he was making between some poetry I have written in the past and the blogging that I have done. I guess I just didn't see myself as creative. He also suggested that I might want to get a voice recorder to capture my thoughts. I told him there was no way I would do that because I HATE my voice! So, he suggested that perhaps I could write some poetry and include a poem about my voice. Hahahahaha! I truly did not think THAT would happen, but I did try that night. Unfortunately, like I lost my train of thought during our counseling, my brain would not pull together my thoughts, so I let it go and moved on to other things. Later, the next morning, I discovered an application on my iPhone to record voice memos, and I thought, hey, what's the harm! I'll give it a try!

So, I did, and I proceeded to talk to myself for the next hour! Now, that is what I want to begin to share with you because:

1. it's easier than writing feels right now
2. it's real!
3. I can talk while I do other things!

So, tell me what you think!

Totally letting go of my perfectionism right now. Not even going to go back and read over this! ;o)

Phooey! I just tried to upload my audio file, and it does not work! I have to do some research and download a new program to see if this can work. I guess I will just post my audio files when I get it worked out.

Coming soon... (I hope!)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Hiccups!

2011-06-01T16:13:00.002-04:00

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

It's not possible, is it???

2011-06-01T08:00:00.011-04:00

After only one month????? Please tell me it's not SO!

I couldn't possibly have gray hair already, could I?????

I mean, only now does my mother have a few, very small gray hairs, and NO, she doesn't color her hair! LOL! ;o)

Who woulda thunk that a few hours of lost sleep would do this to ya!

I'm hoping it's just product buildup. Or maybe, it's my overactive imagination. Yeah. That's what I can say! ;o)

Signed:
The Old Gray Mare :o(

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

About ME!

2011-05-17T08:24:00.026-04:00

Good morning! Mama said that a bunch of you were asking questions about me, so I am going to tell you a little bit about myself.

The other day, she told me about this book she found when she and my aunt were going through some of their old stuff in a place called an attic. She said that I should learn not to collect so much old stuff because it will just weigh me down over the years. The book was called MY Book about ME, and you know what? The book was about my Mama! She says that one day, she will buy me a book just like hers, but I have to be older first.

She wrote it when she was almost 9 years old... WOW! That is REALLY old!!! I am only 5 weeks and 5 days old. The 5 days counts! I can't wait to be bigger!!! :o) This is how big her hand was when she wrote it.

Mama said that she always wanted a little baby, and that God answered her prayers with me! She talks to me about this God person a lot, and says that He loves me and that He has a special plan for my life. I think I need to hear more about this God person! She says that she prayed to Him for a really long time for me! I guess I must be special!

Mama also says that I need to stop spitting up so much of my food if I want to grow big and strong like my Daddy. He says that he loves me, too, and ssshhhh... don't tell Mama, but he knows how to make me quiet better than she does! I like it when he holds me, and bounces me, and pats me on my diaper.

I told my Mama that I don't spit up as much of my new food, on account of 'cause I like it better. The other one she gave me hurt my tummy a lot. I think it had yucky milk proteins or something like that in it. At least, that's what Mama says. :o(

Mama also says that her favorite foods used to be pizza, spaghetti, and macaroni & cheese. She says that she used to eat them all the time and that is why she used to be really big!!! My Aunt Jennifer says she can attest to that. I don't know what that means, but I trust her. Mama says that she didn't used to like spinach, either. Now, she likes it, but not cooked. Just raw in salads. Daddy says that I will learn to be a better eater like him. Aunt Jennifer says that Mama used to even eat macaroni & cheese for Thanksgiving, and that one time, my Mama spit up all her spaghetti and her Daddy had to carry the tray back to the bathroom in the restaurant to clean it off. That is yucky! I would never do that! My Mama says that I shouldn't eat so much of those things because they are not very healthy for me. I think I want to try them, though. Maybe just one bite. Mama says everything is okay if you have just a little.

Did you know that Mama lives in the United States? She says that she always has. She even wrote it down in her book, but...

...when she wrote it down, she didn't know about my Daddy, or the place that he used to live, even though it was written down right there in her book. I guess she didn't pay too much attention when she was 9, but it was written right there. Romania. Guess how old Daddy was when Mama was 9?!?!?! He was 17 years old! She likes to tell that story! She says that he robbed the cradle. Now, why would anybody want to rob a cradle? I'd rather sleep in one! Daddy says that robbing the cradle doesn't count once you get past the age of 20!

So, did you know that my Mama is a girl? She says that my Daddy is a boy, and that so am I!

Mama says that when she was little...

...she wanted to be a nurse. She is not sure why 'cause she doesn't like that kind of thing anymore. Way back then, though, she knew that she wanted to be a mother. Wow! She really did wait a long time for me! Ever since she was nine years old!!! She says that God knew exactly when I would be born and that she just had to wait. She says that she was not very patient, but that I should learn to trust God better than she did. She says that He made the WHOLE WORLD and that He knows what is going on and that I can believe Him.

So. Here I am. My Mama says she can't tell you my real name, but that she is giving me a very special name on her blog. I don't know what a blog is, but she likes it, so I guess I will, too.

She says that she asked all of her blog friends for suggestions about what my name should be. She says that lots of people made really cool suggestions and that some people even told her names in email and in person and that they were all really good! She says that she decided on the one she chose because it combines her bloggy name and my Daddy's bloggy name, and she thought that was appropriate. I don't know what that means, either, but I trust her.

So, my new bloggy name is.... drum roll, please...

I think I might like to play the drums someday.

Oh, sorry, back to my name!

Cinnamon Toast Crunch

Do you like it??? They are going to call me "CTC", for short. Mama says it is because her name is Cinnamon Crunch and Daddy's name is Double Toasted! Get it??? Cinnamon. Toast. Crunch. ?!?!?!?

I like it! Mama says that her bloggy friend thinks that I might eat a cereal called that someday. I think I would like to try it, but not until I get bigger! Mama says that she actually met this bloggy friend and a bunch of others in North Carolina one time. Mama says that she has a lot of friends in a place called North Carolina and she thinks she ought to plan a road trip with Daddy and me to go see everybody! Of course, I had a hard time on our last road trip because I was only 4 weeks old and I was still drinking that yucky old formula. I told Mama I will be better this time, now that I am older! ;o)

Well, I guess that's all I have to tell you about me right now.

Wait... Mama tells me that I forgot to tell you how they found out about me. Oops!

Well... on April 11, Mama and Daddy's social worker emailed them to tell them about me. She told them that I was born on April 7th and that my birth mother wanted to meet them and ask some questions. Mama says that she waited to get an email like that forever. She says that for a long time, she had not believed that God would answer her prayer for me because she had waited so long. She even said that she thought she had heard God wrong. :o( Silly Mama. Now, she says that God knew all along just when I would come. So, Mama and Daddy got this email, and Mama says that she knew right then that this was going to finally happen and that I was going to be her little boy! She said that she had not trusted God before, but that she was going to trust God, now! The social worker said that they could meet with the birth mother that Thursday, but that they might not want to say anything to anyone yet, because nothing is for sure. Mama knew, though. She knew that God was answering her prayer and she wanted to believe Him, even though the outcome had not happened yet. So, she and Daddy told a few people, and everyone prayed. They didn't tell anybody on Facebook, though, because that is like telling the whole world! Mama says I need to be careful about things like that! :o)

Mama and Daddy met with my birth mother and the social workers that Thursday, and they had a really good time over lunch. That night, Mama and Daddy learned that it was for sure and that my birth mother wanted them to be my mama and daddy. Mama says that my birth mother loves me so much and that I will get to see her again sometime soon. I will like that, and I will tell her thank you for letting me come to live with Mama and Daddy!

Then, on April 29th, we had what is called a placement day at the adoption agency,

and everyone came to have a party for ME! That was fun, and a day I will never forget!

Well, my Mama says I have talked on here long enough. She says that when I get older, I will have a limit on computer time. I don't like that very much. She also thanked me for letting her get more sleep last night. She says that I slept for 7 whole hours without waking up to eat! Wow! I don't remember that! :o)

Ok. Come back to see me again, soon, and stop by the house sometime, too. Mama says she likes visitors! :o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

For Susan A....

2011-05-14T15:03:00.004-04:00

Susan,

I got your comment last evening, and I wanted to respond. However, your profile was not enabled for me to view your information or to email you.

Thank you for your kind words. Yes, God IS good, and we give Him all the praise for this precious life He has entrusted to us. Yes, I would be thrilled for you to share my post about Henry Blackaby's Experiencing God. His work made an incredible impact on our lives. Please feel free to let me know when you do post it. I would love to read any thoughts or comments you might add. ;o)

Blessings!

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Update from our agency...

2011-05-06T07:57:00.003-04:00

Ok, I am taking the new mama, sleep-deprived cheater's road to an update.

This is from our agency's website.

I'll be back sometime to give you our spin on things, but for now, enjoy!

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Welcome to the bloggy world!

2011-04-30T10:14:00.003-04:00

Now, I think I need a bloggy name! Any suggestions? :o)

Praisin' the LORD, already! :o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

I did it!!! :o)

2011-04-14T22:02:00.005-04:00

I exceeded my goal! I was a little short this morning, but by this evening (and one crazy day with not a lot of eating!), the rest had come off. I could tell you what my next goal is, but you might think I am a bit crazy. I was so excited when I was no longer obese, and I am even more thrilled now to have reached my goal. The thing is that I am still overweight according to medical standards. So, my new goal is not a number on the scale, but rather to be within normal limits on the Body Mass Index. I do have my ideas on what number I want to weigh, but I am not going to get caught up in that until I see how much more my body is willing to release.

This is a good day. Someday, I'll tell you what I was doing exactly one year ago today. Someday soon, I'll tell you what other miracles God is working in our lives! He is good!!! :o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

My most searched post...

2011-04-14T08:21:00.002-04:00

The #1 post that I very often see pop up as being searched on my live feed is this one.

In fact, that just happened again a brief time ago. Is it okay if I am encouraged by my own post? Well, I am. I pray you will be too.

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Encouragement...

2011-04-12T07:02:00.000-04:00

Acts 17:26
"From one man HE made every nation of men,
that they should inhabit the whole earth;
and HE determined the times set for them
and the exact places where they should live."

Isn't it good and comforting to know that God has determined the intimate details of your life?!?

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

12... 11... 10...

2011-04-05T12:20:00.009-04:00

I will get back to posting old, cute pictures of myself and my family soon enough. In the meantime, however, I wanted to draw your attention to the upcoming anniversary of a change in my life.

April 14.

This was the day, last year, that I began my journey to lose 34 pounds. Along the way, there have been a lot of ups and downs, and more than my fair share of plateaus along the way. Right now, I find myself exactly one pound higher than my lowest weight, leaving me 3.2 pounds to lose to reach my goal. Doable? Perhaps. I really hope so, and I am doing everything I can to get to my self-imposed ambition. I will say, however, that I am currently losing the same 2 pounds for the sixth time!!! So, if I do not cross the finish line just yet, I will just keep moving forward because I certainly do NOT want to go back! :o)

A cool thing happened today. I saw a friend who has been teaching me about running, and she told me that my pants were too big. Hehehe! Those would be my just purchased a few weeks ago, size 12 pants. That would mean that I am a size 10, right? :o)

Btw, I really like the Weight Watchers online program!

10 days and counting...

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Siblings!

2011-04-01T12:00:00.002-04:00

Me and my siblings. I am obviously the littlest cute one. ;o)

Must have been really sunny that day! I'm the only one with a semi-smile on my face, and the others are all squinting. LOL! :o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Things I love...

2011-03-31T06:51:00.010-04:00

From the time I was little, I LOVED our cats! I was always near them, and tales have even been told of them sleeping in the crib with me. I can neither confirm nor deny. :o)

Apparently, from the picture and the figure I am now working hard to trim down, I loved food, too. Look at those chubby legs!!! :o) I wonder if my parents noticed how I was holding the bottle? Not very sanitary, huh? No wonder I don't mind kisses from my dogs. LOL! ;o)

I guess I also loved any kind of animals, for that matter. I was pretty much not afraid to touch anything. :o) Um... did you notice the bonnet? Yep. I wore one of those every day of my life growing up. That's what you get when your light skin burns like mine does! :o)

Phones. LOVED them when I was little. Now, you couldn't pay me to talk on the phone. Only as a necessity, but not for fun anymore. ;o)

Hey, where did the blonde hair come from??? It has been dark as long as I can remember. Did any of you dark-haired beauties have blonde hair when you were little? Did you know that it is spelled blond if you are a man and blonde if you are a women? I know you couldn't live without that little tidbit of information. You're welcome. ;o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

The most important tool!!!!!

2011-03-30T12:42:00.000-04:00

Today is a sad day. When I tried to weigh my food on my most favorite and essential weight loss tool, this is what I saw...

...soon to be followed by this.

I can guarantee you the first place we are headed tonight is to buy a new battery!

#can'tlivewithoutmybiggestloserfoodscale

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Piano...

2011-03-30T06:46:00.000-04:00

I think this is the youngest picture I have of me "playing" the piano. I am sure I was just pounding on the piano here. LOL! :o)

I actually started taking lessons when I was five and continued through the end (or close to it) of high school. I was okay. Not fabulous. Now, I haven't played in years :o( since we left the church where D.T. was the minister of music. I just haven't really had an opportunity since then. Now, I'm not sure if I even remember how. ;o)

Someday.

What instrument did you learn to play growing up? Do you still play? :o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Cry...

2011-03-29T07:14:00.003-04:00

Pretty sure I had just been crying in this picture... it could have been the tights they always made me wear. ;o)

...and, I think this one, too. That, or I was really tired.

Not much has changed. I am still a crier (cryer?). You know what I mean.

You love my dad's pants, don't you? ;o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Daddy & Me! :o)

2011-03-28T07:31:00.001-04:00

I spent some time with my family this weekend and had the opportunity to go through some old pictures. Some of them, I was very familiar with, and others, I had never seen. This is one of the ones I had never seen. LOVE it!!!

Perhaps, I will share with you a picture a day for the next I don't know how many days. Easy blogging, right? :o)

Being that I don't have children, I am bad at guessing ages. However, I would estimate that I am maybe 15 or 18 months old in this picture???

I love my daddy! :0)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

From theory to FAITH!

2011-03-15T12:07:00.008-04:00

Recently, God answered a question that I have been asking for a long time. Why? Not why did He answer. The question was "Why?". The answer was not something that I had never heard before. It just became more real to me as I read it once again. It moved from theory to FAITH... from my head to my heart.

*******
Experiencing God Day By Day

by Henry Blackaby

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Testing Reveals Your Heart

"And you shall remember that the LORD your God led you all the way these forty years in the wilderness, to humble you and test you, to know what was in your heart, whether you would keep His commandments or not. "So He humbled you, allowed you to hunger, and fed you with manna which you did not know nor did your fathers know, that He might make you know that man shall not live by bread alone; but man lives by every word that proceeds from the mouth of the LORD. (Deuteronomy 8:2-3)

God allows us to suffer difficulties and hardships for a purpose. God led the children of Israel to wander through the wilderness for forty years in order to humble them and test them. When they refused to obey Him and enter the Promised Land, the Israelites revealed that they did not really know Him. If they had, they would have had more faith. God spent the next forty years testing the hearts of His people to see if they were prepared for His next assignment.

Testing reveals what is in your heart and produces a robust faith (James 1:3, 12). God allowed His people to hunger so they could experience His provision and develop a deeper level of trust in Him. As the people walked with God they came to understand that their lives depended upon His Word. They learned that God’s Word was the most important thing they had. After depending on God for forty years while living in the desert, the people listened when God spoke, and they believed. When they finally entered the Promised Land and waged war against their enemies, the Israelites knew that God’s word meant life and death. They were prepared to listen to Him, and as a result He led them to an astounding victory.

Is God presently testing you in some area of your life? What has His testing revealed? Have you become bitter toward God because of where He has led you? Or have you come to trust Him more as a result of what you have gone through?

*******
So, here is the deal as I approach some significant dates and events in my life. In 36 days, I will turn 35. In 86 days, our adoption contract will end. Right now, I have no desire to pursue having a child - by treatments or with another agency - beyond then. While I know that God has taught me so much through these experiences, part of me realizes that a decade of my life has gone by, caught up in my plans. I want the next decade to be caught up in HIS! If God intends for us to be parents, He will accomplish anything that needs to happen without my assistance. What a concept! :o) I have spent long enough trying to make everything happen. I don't pretend to understand God's plans. In fact, there is no way that I possibly could. The simplicity of it is that I must acknowledge and trust Him to direct me. Nothing more. Nothing less. The beauty of it is that I don't have to worry. He can handle it all, and that, praise God, is true freedom!

I know that was kind of blunt at the end. Sorry for that. It's just that is what I had to say, and I said it. I thank you for listening and for praying for us all this time. God knows the plans He has for us, and I look forward to seeing those come to pass, whatever they might be.

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Moving on...

2011-03-10T07:42:00.010-05:00

I mentioned in my last post that I am changing my weight loss strategy.

While I absolutely love, Love, LOVE Livestrong.com and the MyPlate tracking tool, it just wasn't working for me anymore, as evidenced by only a half-pound loss in one month! One of the things that really attracted me to this program in the first place was its ease of use because of its extensive database of foods (even some international ones) and restaurants. I could type in just about anything and I was almost guaranteed to be able to find the nutritional value to count towards my calories for the day. I would have recommended it to anyone who wanted to lose weight.

I still would.

I just can't use it for myself anymore. Once the calculation between my current weight and the amount of weight I wanted to lose each week put me below the magic number of 1200, which you should never go below, I had nowhere left to go and I was hungry all. the. time!!!

So, I've been thinking about it for a while, and the other week, I finally decided that I needed to try something else. I've told myself for years that I would never use this program because I just haven't liked it in the past, but I know people for whom it was working and what I was doing certainly was not working, so I thought, what do I have to lose? Um, weight, obviously! LOL! :o)

So, I did it. I began using the e-Tools at Weight Watchers. No, I am not going to meetings. That is definitely a reason that some people choose Weight Watchers, but they are not for me. I like that the e-Tools are very similar to what I was already doing at Livestrong.com, except that it is based on a different formula and there are several very different premises. Honestly, Livestrong fit very well into my lifestyle, while Weight Watchers feels more like a diet. I really don't like that, but it is probably what I need at this point. Livestrong allowed me to lose 30+ pounds without really changing any of my bad habits. I could eat bad things. I could avoid good things like fruits and vegetables if I didn't feel like eating them (I am really not a fruit and vegetable person). I just had to limit my portions, and I could easily stay within my calorie range for the day. Alas (sigh), that time has come to an end. Like I said, Weight Watchers feels more like a diet, and that is good right now. I need the structure. I need a reason to not make bad food selections. I need a reason to make good food selections.

It's been a fairly smooth transition for me, and I can already see some changes in my level of behavior modification (come on... you know I had to throw that counseling term in! LOL! :o)). I have stopped choosing some foods that are just more points than they are worth to me. Also, in the past week-and-a-half, I have eaten more fruits and vegetable than I probably have in the past year! Why, you ask??? Well... they are FREE on the new Weight Watchers PointsPlus program. That's pretty good incentive to eat them, right? I mean, if you are hungry at 9 p.m. and are out of calories on the Livestrong program, you have two choices: 1. exceed your calories or 2. go to bed hungry. If you are hungry at 9 p.m. on PointsPlus, you can have a banana and actually be able to sleep well that night. Well, I was tired of being hungry, so this program made sense for me.

I'll admit, I am still not 100% sold on it, but I am going to give it a fair shot. I am trying it for a month, and we will see where I am at the end. Perhaps, I will even finally meet my initial goal of 34 pounds before April and the one year anniversary of beginning this journey comes around! That would be awesome and allow me to put up a ticker with my NEW goal. I'll tell you what that is when I get there! ;o) Hey, I lost 1.4 pounds this week, and I think that is WAY better than 1/2 pound in a whole month! :o)

Thankfully, I am not letting my relationship with Livestrong die completely. Like I said before, I LOVE their database and the one that Weight Watchers has leaves a lot to be desired. I actually can't find much of anything on it. So, Livestrong will be my consultant. Hey, consulting is a lucrative profession, right? ;o) Yep. When I need to find nutritional information, Livestrong is the place. I can find it all there, and then plug it into the Weight Watchers PointsPlus calculator, which is the bomb! I don't know the formula behind it, but they are using a concept which I started using from the beginning of my journey. Lower fat. Increase protein. Increase fiber. They just ignore the calorie count because, quite frankly, if you do the other three things, the calories naturally fall in line. That's the ticket!

Give 'em a try. Livestrong. Weight Watchers. Paper and pen. Whatever. Just know what (and how much) you are eating!

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Sweet chocolate dreams...

2011-03-04T07:38:00.017-05:00

Our time with family has come to an end, and it feels like a distant dream. A sweet, yet also bittersweet, chocolate dream, perhaps. I had lots of energy the day after we got back, but there is a reason it is called jet "lag." While I had no trouble getting back on my American schedule, there was definitely a "lag" for me before my body started to feel the exhaustion. Perhaps, until then, I was still running on travel adrenaline!

I have plenty of content to share, but until I catch up with myself, allow me to share these pictures. We have never gone to a restaurant in Romania before, instead enjoying lots of home cooked yummy things. This time, though, we ventured out to two places, where we ate the amazing things you see below. It was quite a treat!

Yeah, we split that. Now, we need to learn how to make the chicken snitzel with cornflakes. The polenta, we already know how to make! :o)

This, I ate all of all by myself! The chocolate ganache was A-maz-ing!!! :o) I am certain, I will never know how to make it. :o(

This was D.T.'s. A crepe resting in a vanilla sauce...

...filled with cream and fruits.

We will definitely, without question, be back! Fortunately, God was gracious to us in our weight loss journey. When you go somewhere like Romania to see family who are amazing cooks, there is incredible temptation to eat far more than you should of things you would be better off avoiding. Fortunately, family understood and were incredibly supportive of our efforts. Other than the things above, we kept our discipline reasonably in check. After my one week, 10 pound increase at Disney World in December, I was scared. Very, very scared. I am proud to announce, though, that this time, each of us came home only 2 pounds heavier than when we left. You have NO idea how truly amazing that is!!! Praise God! Plus, I have already lost .8 of those two pounds. On my way down! For the last more than a month, I have been very stuck where I was on the scale, plus incredibly hungry ALL. THE. TIME!!! So, I am changing up my strategy for the next 40 or so pounds, and will share more of this with y'all soon!

I may also post some more small tidbits about our trip here and there. Until then, have a great weekend! :o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Inching closer...

2011-02-17T12:11:00.016-05:00

Veeerry slooooowwwlly, but surely, I am approaching the realization of my (first) weight loss goal. Make no mistake about it, I will not be done losing weight when I reach that goal. No, my intention is to continue moving onward and ~~upward~~ downward until I reach a body mass index that could be considered normal. Right now, I am just overweight, but at least, I am no longer obese. Hey, guess who else is no longer obese?

Doesn't he look fabulous, daaahling? :o) Yes, I realize his head is missing, but it was the least blurry picture I had of him getting ready for church, and I liked the outfit on him. I think it shows off his skinniness, too. LOL! :o) Don't you love all the dog toys in the picture? They are ev-e-ry-where! :o)

Oh, wait... here's the head!

That's much better!

Anywho.

I have been stuck in the same two pounds for the last month, so needless to say, I was a bit frustrated. So, I have been kicking things up a bit, and I started running. Not much. Just 3-minute increments, 3 times during a 20-30 minute workout on the treadmill. Surprisingly, I like it. I am down to a 14 minute - 08 second mile. For you runners, that might seem really slow, but I am shaving the time down as much as I can without doing damage to my body. I just need to get some good running clothes and SHOES. Goodness, I need different shoes than what I am wearing to run right now! I am seeing results, though! My ticker finally moved, and I am a mere 2.2 pounds away from my goal!!!

But... Romania. We leave tomorrow, and I have great fears that I will return heavier than when we left. A friend (who is teaching me lots about running! yay!) did give me a good quote to keep in mind, and I. like. it!!!

“Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels!”

Isn't that SO true?!?!?! It has been running (hahaha!) through my mind all day, and I intend to say it to myself before every bite I eat on this trip. Please pray that I can have the self-control I need!

By the way, did I mention that I fit into and purchased a pair of size 12 pants the other day??? I did! Seriously, I know that might not be a big deal to you skinny-minnies out there, but I haven't seen that size in decades.... and speaking of decades, this morning, I finally broke through to the next decade of pounds, which I actually don't remember from the first time I was in them. Back then, I think I jumped over about... um... 3 decades of pounds. Yep. It feels much better this time around. You know what else that means? Yep! Size 10 is just around the corner! :o) :o) :o)

Guess that's about it for now. Please pray for us as we travel to see family. I'll try to hop online a time or two while we are over there... in between doing the stairs in the apartment building for exercise! ;o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Headless dog!

2011-02-10T06:31:00.003-05:00

Oh, wait... there are the teeth. :o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Spring!

2011-02-02T22:55:00.004-05:00

I heard a bird singing yesterday.

I know I am not crazy because Phil did not see his shadow.

Could it be true?

Is spring on its way early this year?

Someone said it was 55 degrees here today, but it was cold and blustery when I got out of work.

The beauty in the way God designed the four seasons is that,
though each one is distinct,
they all work together to bring life and growth.
Spring is a period of freshness and new life.
Summer sees growth and productivity.
Autumn is a time for harvesting the rewards of past labors.
Winter is the season of dormancy and closure.
Each season has its own unique beauty and
makes a significant contribution to life.

From Experiencing God Day by Day.
Life's Seasons
February 2, 2011
by Henry Blackaby

I pray that spring will be here soon!

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

God is über-Good!

2011-01-31T06:42:00.018-05:00

We all know that, right? Well, there are other times when we actually experience it... even in the little things. This was actually a fabulous weekend... after a pretty good week, too.

Allow me to share. :o) The other week, I was looking for a devotional book to download on the reader app for my iPhone, and I went back to a tried and true favorite. You can actually read his devotionals every day online, but I wanted something that I would have with me everywhere, and the electronic version was really cheap, so I bought it.

Here's where the God part comes in!!!

I have my options set up online for one-click buying. In other words, I don't have to go through a bunch of annoying steps to make my purchase. I just click on one link, and I'm done. Off to the download. So, that's what I did. One click. Download. Then, I saw what I did not expect. TWO books downloading. Both of which I apparently purchased somehow... unintentionally. No surprise to God, though, and OH-so-worth the second, also cheap price. I don't even know how it happened, except that God intended for me to have it. Both books had such a similar title that they had both showed up in my search results. I love this second book, though! I am actually wondering how I made it this far in my spiritual journey without ever reading anything from this man. His writing is completely amazing! Direct! Cut-to-the core. Challenging, yet easy to understand. IMHO, something that every Christian, without exception, needs to read!!! Another interesting fact... he was born a mere 51.1 miles from my home town! Of course, that was 114 years ago. I imagine the place looked different back then. Still. Cool. :o)

Then, this weekend. Y'all know how much D.T. loves to cook, right? Well, he loves to grill, too, and grill he HAS! We bought our grill 3 or 4 years ago, and we have used it well. I do mean, REALLY well. Now, spring is coming (YAY!!!) and we need to be prepared to contribute to our weight loss efforts with some yummy (and healthy) grilled favorites! So, we needed some new grill plates, because the old ones had pieces of metal coming off onto our food.

Yuck. Gross. Unfortunately, the manufacturer of our grill went out of business. It figures. So, off we headed to our local home improvement store with one of our yucky grill plates in hand (in a plastic bag, of course) so we could compare the size to any other grill plates they might have in stock. Not much luck, though. Nothing really matched, and if it even came close to being the right size, it wasn't the kind of material we wanted. We were hoping to find something cast iron since everything ceramic-coated quickly deteriorates and leaves off it's... well... coating. Alas, they had none. Except... that a sales person was very helpful and offered to look through their leftovers. Their spare parts. Until he found three smaller (to match the total size of our two bigger) grill plates that were, in fact, cast iron (woohoo!) and that he said we could have for... get this... NOTHING. Nada. Free. Can you believe it? He GAVE them to us, and walked us right out the front door.

Wow. God is good, regardless of whatever happens in our lives... but He also really showed His goodness to us this weekend. We certainly didn't want or need to pay for new grill plates. We had just returned from spending money on our upcoming trip to Romania, on a few new clothes for Mr. Skinny, and on some organizational things that make me über-happy. :o)

Our other shoe rack just wasn't big enough to fit
all of both of our shoes.
So, we bought this one for his shoes. Hehehe! :o)

Look! Now, there aren't any more shoes
piled up in our entry way!!! :o)

Of course, we tried to be good stewards of God's money by making our purchases at T.J. M@xx. You know, there is a reason I don't ever go in there. Good prices or not, it is really easy to spend a lot of money in that place, especially for two people that really like to spend $$$! :o) The best part of the day, though, was when D.T. tried on and purchased a pair of $17, size 34 jeans. Seriously! I am SO proud of that man! über-cool! :o)

Church was really good, too. We are starting to settle into this new place. We are still seeking God for which Sunday School class He would have us attend, but I really believe we can grow here. I am attending a women's Bible study that begins this Wednesday night. I can't tell you when the last time I attended a women's Bible study was. I also can't tell you when the last time I attended church on a Wednesday night was. Actually, I have really allowed the schedule of my life to get in the way of my spiritual growth, and I want to intentionally change that. I want to get back on His schedule. I am glad that God led us here.

How has God shown His goodness in your life lately?

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

P.S. oh, I almost forgot! I got an über-good sale on Sobe yesterday! You had to buy 10... like I wouldn't anyway??? and they were all $0.49 each! When I heard about that sale, I jumped right in my car and hopped on over! 40 bottles later... (for those of you trying to figure it out in your head, that's $19.60 all at once instead of $40 here and there!)

:o)

It did take awhile to find room for them everywhere in my kitchen. LOL!

P.P.S. Did I tell you? The temperature was 55 degrees here yesterday! In January! The dogs enjoyed their walk and being outside very much!

Our backyard did not enjoy their digging quite as much.

We have some serious fixing to do once spring really comes. :o)

Thirst...

2011-01-28T07:21:00.000-05:00

Every morning, when I am in the tub, Goldie comes to beg for a drink of cold water.

"but whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst.
Indeed, the water I give him will become in him
a spring of water welling up to eternal life."
John 4:14

"Of all God's creation, man is the only creature implanted with spiritual aspirations, leading him to prayer and worship. Wherever you find man, you will find him engaged in some sort of worship. No mistake about it, something within the creature lifts itself up in response to something within the Creator. That 'something' is the great mystery of the human heart created in the image of God. If a culture does not know the true Jesus Christ, it will invent its own God and worship that." ~A.W. Tozer Experiencing the Presence of God

Oh, that we would thirst for the presence of our Father, His son ~Jesus Christ, and the Holy Spirit He has sent us and that we would put aside anything that hinders us so that we, too, would beg for even just one drink.

What do you worship?

What do you thirst for?

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

I found it!!! :o)

2011-01-22T16:20:00.003-05:00

Ahem. I mean... my wonderful husband found it waaaaayyy down deep in the couch cushions. Hmmm... I could have sworn (except that I don't) that I brought it upstairs with me last night. But I did pray that I would find it... at the exact moment he was finding it. And I didn't even know he was looking. Pretty cool that God would even care about something so insignificant, yet important to me. :o)

Wanna see my haircut? I mean, it's not much different than before except that I keep making her cut it shorter and shorter. Pretty funky, huh? :o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

What did we ever do before cell phones???

2011-01-22T10:08:00.006-05:00

I thought I was having a fabulous Saturday morning. I even slept in... if you can call 7 a.m. sleeping in, but at least my body did not wake me up at 5 a.m.

Then, I discovered that I can't find my phone. And it's dead, so I can't even call it to find it. And I have a haircut appointment at noon. And we have people coming over later day.

And I can't FIND MY PHONE!!!!! Aaahhhhh!!!!!!!!!! I can't leave the house without my cell phone!!!

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Things that make me smile...

2011-01-21T06:22:00.005-05:00

Seeing my weight loss ticker finally move again! This means that I have lost all my Disney weight, plus a little. Now, I weigh the least I ever have in my adult life. There is something to be said for persistence! More to come!!! :o)

Seeing all my dog's toys on the stairs. You would think we had children in the house, or something.

My hubby's skinny smile. He's lost even more weight than me. What's with guys losing weight easier than women, anyway?!? :o) Oh, and no, that is not his sweater behind him. He is sitting in someone else's chair.

Beautiful mountains and the moon in the morning on our way into work.

Finding the blankets not covering our couch when we get home. It used to be that they only removed half of the blanket. Now, it's both sides. Gotta love em', huh? At least they make me smile. :o)

Don't stop praying for me. I can tell, and I greatly appreciate it.

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

The WINTER of my life...

2011-01-20T15:33:00.005-05:00

Winter has been a difficult time for me for several years now. Perhaps, it is like that for some of you, too. Reduced sunlight. Shorter days. Longer nights. When I was a child, I used to love it, but then I got old. Now, I don't like the cold... or the snow... or the ice... or the holidays. I know. Bah humbug! Really, though, Christmas is not what it is supposed to be, and I just don't like all of the hype. I promise this entire post is not going to be bitter. I just felt the need to let you know where I was at.

I am really struggling right now. Part of it is my job. Part of it is the adoption. Part of it is my personality. Part of it is winter. Mostly, it just is. I guess I am struggling to find purpose. Maybe it is an early mid-life crisis of sorts. I remember the old job that I had, and I remember how difficult and stressful it was. Yet, I had the daily opportunity to change lives. What I am doing right now doesn't matter to anyone. It doesn't make a difference. I don't like that.

I think about our adoption. There is little more than four months left on our contract, and then, we will be finished. With nothing. 30 months wasted. I am not even sure that I even want the outcome that I used to hope for. Something in me has changed, and I don't like that either. I used to feel like God created me with a purpose to make a difference in the lives of others. I'm just not able to do that right now, and I don't know what to do about that. Being a mother used to sound like a good thing. Now, it sounds like the most foreign thing in the world to me. The thought of a child used to bring me joy. Now, it just scares me. This might be the most honest I have ever been. I feel like God doesn't think I can do it. Otherwise, why would He have given me such a strong desire, only to withhold it from me. And honestly? I think I agree with Him.

Wow, I really hope spring gets here soon. I don't know how much more of this I can take. I will actually be glad when our contract is up because, then, I can move on with life.

Please be in prayer for me that I will see God's truth and reject Satan's lies.

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Encouragement...

2011-01-11T06:53:00.011-05:00

Recently, we began attending a new church. It was time to shake things up a bit for us. It doesn't hurt that it is even closer to our house than our previous church was which, by the way, was only seven minutes away. I think God did that! :o)

The following video was shared on our first day there (incidentally, the first Sunday after the New Year) and it was so encouraging to me. SO full of spiritual truth! I did a little bit of asking (read: snooping) around until I was able to discover where they had gotten the video. So, now I would like to share it with you. I hope it encourages you as much as it did me.

Enjoy!

...and if you are a pastor (hint, hint, Jon...) check out the website where I got it. A-ma-zing resources for the church!!! :o)

So... what was your favorite quote on this video? Do share! :o)

Oh... didn't pay that much attention? Oops! Watch it again! ;o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Glorious Day!

2011-01-04T07:22:00.001-05:00

Have you heard this song from Casting Crowns?!? It takes me back to a really old hymn, makes me want to sing, and makes me look forward to EASTER! :o)

LOVE it!!!

...if you want to hear it again, feel free to find my playlist at the bottom of this blog. It is the first song right now! I could listen to it over and over again. Actually, I think I will do just that! :o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

1.1.11

2011-01-03T21:18:00.012-05:00

I know that the day has passed, the mark of a new year, but I could not let it go without saying some things.

To begin with, the repetition of numbers... I think it is kind of neat, and it tells me something. A number of years ago, I recall someone talking about numbers meaning something in relation to God. I don't remember everything that was said, but I do remember talking about sets of three numbers. Like 3-3-3 reminding us of the Trinity. Or 7-7-7 reminding us of God's perfection. I have remembered this often since then, and when I see numbers in triplicate, it always draws my attention in that moment back to God. Well, except if the number is 6. That one is not so good. It can happen so unexpectedly, though, and it makes me realize that God is with me and watching over me.

Like I said. Reminders. Random times. Random places.

The other thing I wanted to talk about is Jeremiah 29:11. I mentioned this verse a few weeks ago, and since then, I have tried to write about it no less than five times. Complete posts which, for some reason, God would not allow me to publish. One was too bitter. One was theologically incorrect. One was waaayy too long and involved. So, let's see how short and sweet I can make this. :o)

For I know the plans I have for you,"
declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you,
plans to give you hope and a future.

When I was a teenager, I loved this verse. Over the years, though, my perspective became shaded by my experiences, and I felt like God's plans could not prosper me or give me hope. I felt harmed and without a future. What I have discovered, though... in short, is that like the Israelites to whom God was speaking in this verse, I was looking for God to fulfill MY plans MY way rather than allowing Him to work out HIS plan that He knows is best for me.

In the King James version of this verse, the last line which refers to hope and a future is translated as an expected end. I thought about that for awhile and compared it to the faith that is spoken of in Hebrews... that refers to what we hope for... what we trust in. What I discovered was that what we expect... what we hope for... what we trust in... should not be our idea of how we want things to happen. Not a set of perfect circumstances. Not a job. Not success. Not health. Not a baby. Rather, it is a person. Jesus Christ. Honestly, that is difficult for me. Not because I doubt Him, but because I struggle to separate my expectations from my experiences. I am working on it, though, and I guess that is all I have to say about that.

I hope that all makes sense.

Regarding our adoption, I am still praying that God would bring us a child. Humanly speaking, there is not much hope for that to happen, but He has not said no, so I am still asking. We have a little more than 5 months remaining on our 30-month contract. Maybe this will be the year.

"Father, if you are willing,
take this cup from me;
yet not my will, but yours be done."
Luke 22:42

I pray that you will all have a blessed new year, fully expecting God to do amazing things in your life. Not expecting an event, but expecting HIM!

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

HOPE personified...

2010-12-30T06:55:00.004-05:00

...5 p.m. last night

and there was noticeably more light than the night before.

Did you know that the winter solstice happened on our anniversary this year? I knew we were special. I'd like to think it happened just for me.

SPRING is coming! :o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Merry CHRISTmas...

2010-12-25T17:54:00.004-05:00

...from our family to yours!

The day has almost passed us by, and I can't help but think about the day He was born so many years ago. There was no room in the inn for Him that night. Sadly, there is still no room for Him in the lives of so many, specifically in America, this night. I do not understand why just the mention of His name elicits such harsh rejection.

JESUS!

He came to seek and to save that which was lost. He abandoned all rights to His throne, leaving His Father in heaven. He became like man. Like us. Why will we not embrace the gift He has given us? Have you accepted His free gift? He is patiently waiting with open arms to call you His child.

Merry CHRISTmas!

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Double Dose: an eventful anniversary!

2010-12-22T06:35:00.006-05:00

WARNING: if you have a weak stomach for blood or medical things, just stop here and call it a day.

***

It certainly was that. Eventful. I think the most important part is that everything that happened, we journeyed through together.

Early in the morning, I went downstairs for something or other and then came back up the stairs, two at a time (holding on to the railing, or course. :o)) Catching my foot on the lip of the step two from the top, I lunged forward and caught myself with all of my body weight on the little finger of my left hand. I know. Brilliant.

It did hurt quite a bit, but I had no interest in going to the doctor or the emergency room because I was sure it was just sprained. As the day wore on, however, the finger got increasingly blue, black, and swollen.

We went home for lunch, and I rushed through trying to prepare a fruit salad for later that evening. I am definitely NOT the cook in the family, but D.T. was chatting with his mom in Romania via Skype, so I decided I could do it. The only problems were that I needed to cut an apple, I am not good with a knife, my little finger was numb, my hand was cold because the dogs were out back on their leads and the back door was wide open. This all led to the knife slipping and me cutting off a teeny tiny piece of flesh on the ring finger of my left hand right by my cuticle. Um, did you know that that area of your body bleeds a LOT?!?!? It does. Like dripping all over everything. D.T. said that I definitely have a double dose of klutziness in me.

So, D.T. finished up the food preparations while I tried to stop the bleeding. No such luck. Back to work and he bandaged it up for me. 3 hours later. Still bleeding. More blue. More black. I figured I should probably visit the doctor. They got me in very quickly right before he was supposed to head to a meeting. I told him what had happened, but before he looked at my finger, he said he should also look at the cut I had bandaged. Um, yeah. I told him that I thought I had been in there to see him a bit too much lately. He told me that some patients are just needier than others. Ha! Remove bloody bandage as wound continues to bleed profusely, and he says three hours was more than enough time for it to have clotted up. He bandaged it more securely and started to look at my finger. 3 minutes later, I had bled through the bandage he put on, and he determined that we had to be a bit more aggressive about it. Read: big needle, injection of numbing fluid (oowwww!!!), cauterizing machine, and the bleeding finally stopped. Then, they buddy wrapped my injured finger next to my now burned finger and sent me off for an x-ray.

It was a fabulous, day, wouldn't you say? :o)

Finger not broken, but still very black and blue. Ice definitely helps.

Last night:

D.T. finishing a final assignment for the class he was taking. Up all night. Literally. I got up, read through it this morning, and made a few corrections. I thought I was done with this when he graduated from seminary. Yeah, right. He still wants to get his doctorate. He turned it in. He is finally free of taking and teaching classes now for um... about two weeks. Sigh.

At least we did it all together, right? :o)

Tonight, we are going out to dinner with friends to celebrate. Here's hoping for an uneventful evening and an even more uneventful 15th year! :o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Ouch!

2010-12-21T10:37:00.006-05:00

I think C.C. needs to learn how to walk up the stairs without tripping and catching herself on her little finger. Or, perhaps she needs to just stop taking them two at a time in an effort to burn calories.

Clutz!

;o)

And, I was just getting used to having thinner fingers.

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Us

2010-12-21T06:23:00.003-05:00

14 years ago...

...and Today!

Well, not today, but you know what I mean. ;o)

Happy Anniversary, D.T.! I thank God for you! I would not change one second we have had together.

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Wow!

2010-12-17T19:52:00.007-05:00

He's come a long way in five years! Actually, so has our living room decor! LOL!!! :o)

Doesn't he look fabulous?!?!?

I think he's certainly got some bragging rights of his own! 33 pounds and counting... :o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Snowy Afternoon!

2010-12-16T17:00:00.009-05:00

The weatherman said it was supposed to be bad, so we were hoping for a day off... or at least a delay, but no such luck. We waited until the last possible moment to begin getting ready this morning. Fortunately, our place of employment decided to close at noon, so we at least got the afternoon off!

Here's how it went! :o)

We stopped at Food Lion on our way home to purchase some carrots to make soup. You know, it being a cold day and all. $52 later. Please tell me we aren't the only ones who come out of the store with more than what is on the list.

Then, we slid (literally) down to the stop light next to our road. It was really not a pretty sight.

We got home and let the puppies out for some well-deserved play time in the snow!

I wish I had their energy to run circles like that! Goldie really wanted to come inside at the end. Meanie me. They didn't end up staying out long. They must be like me. Not so much the fans of winter!

Then, D.T. and I did a bit of cooking, and I noticed this in our cupboard.

Um... yeah. Does anybody else find that you bought two of things and didn't even realize it?

Then, I remembered that we have a whole bunch of fresh thyme left over from our summer gardening efforts. So, then, why exactly do we have two containers of dried thyme?

D.T. brought the plant inside last night because of the weather we expected today. Now, it is sitting in our downstairs bathroom so that Ben doesn't eat it. He tried. The plant on the left is oregano. The one on the right is thyme. Otherwise known as cimbru in Romanian. They put it into EVERYTHING, so imagine D.T.'s delight when he actually discovered the name of the plant in America! We LOVE it! :o)

Here is the rest of what we made this afternoon.

As much as D.T. loves to do the gourmet cooking thing, we also like it simple sometimes. What you see on the right is Tys0n Southern Style Breaded Chicken from W@lm@rt. We spray it with P@m and bake it in the oven. Yum! On the left is Dreamfield's pasta (good if you're watching your carbs... you're welcome for the coupon :o)) with some pesto from S@m's Club and walnuts. I LOVE walnuts in pasta. :o) It all fits in the diet, too. The key is portion control. Measure everything you put in your mouth! :o)

Well, how random was that for ya? LOL! :o)

Back to the bath, proof-reading my hubby's class assignments (yes... he is taking another class!), and then to work out a bit on the treadmill. I am still WAY full from the food we made, so dinner will be the leftovers I didn't finish, and it will be MUCH later.

I hope y'all got a nice snow day today, too. Any chance we'll have a repeat performance tomorrow? I could only wish. :o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

It's about time, C.C.!!!

2010-12-15T06:27:00.001-05:00

I know, I know. I've dropped off the face of the earth. I've actually got a lot to say, but I think I will have to break it down into different posts (or at least sections... we'll see!), or I may get all lost and tangled up in my futile attempts to make it all perfect. ;o)

Bread pudding & Dole Whip & Dessert Parties, OH MY!!!
Our trip to Disney was good. Tiring and fuh-ree-zing!!! I'm sure you've heard all over the news that the price of our orange juice might go up because the Florida farmers are losing their crops (is that what it is called on a tree??? Maybe harvest is a better word.) because of the weather. Well, it was seriously cold while we were there. 30's-50's every day. Disney made a killing on gloves, scarves, and sweatshirts. I really did abandon all dieting efforts while I was there, and boy did I enjoy it! Not the meats and side dishes so much. Nope. It was more the SUGAR!!! :o) Yeah. Having a scale with me did positively NO good! I gained 9.5 pounds, which I am now quickly working off. :o( I'll post a few select pics and some video clips as soon as I get a chance to upload them. Christmas time really is AWESOME around Disney!

Class is creeping up on me!
My next intensive class starts in a little over a month, and I have a TON of pre-class work to get done!!! I better high-tail myself into gear! This class and one more will put me at half-way through my program.

Other random things...
I've got a bunch of other stuff floating around my brain right now, but time is short. So, I guess I will just post some things randomly as I get a few minutes here and there. I do have some thoughts I have been investigating and studying about a verse that I am sure y'all are familiar with.

Has this verse ever been special to you in your life? Please, SHARE! :o) I remember LOVE-ing this verse as a teenager when life was so full of possibility. Now, as an adult, it kind of irks me a bit. Just keepin' it real. You know how life can shade the way we see things. So, I decided I better examine the context to see where the writer was actually coming from, and you know what I found? There is a lot more to this verse than initially meets the eye! I'll share soon.

Guess that's it for now. Somebody, please slap me the next time I wait this long to post! I'm amazed I actually still have any followers at all. See y'all later! :o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Meet the new C.C. & D.T.!

2010-12-06T06:55:00.005-05:00

We decided to get a new one since we are both... well... thinner than two years ago! :o)

I know. It is just a caricature, but hey, ya know. I like it! :o)

Having a blast! Wish y'all could be here with us. :o)

Oh, and as far as my luggage, an honorable mention kudos to bo, jill, and breanna londagin for their guess of a picture of our dogs. That was a very good guess, but unfortunately incorrect. A winning kudos goes out to "C," another friend of mine who guessed privately via email. We brought our scale. Not the food kind. The body kind. I know. Crazy!!! I just want to be able to catch myself before I am too far gone out of control.

It's not working. :o( My family says it isn't real weight. That it is just all of the salt. Maybe they are right. I don't know. We'll see. :o)

Oh, well. Having a blast! Wish y'all could be here with us. :o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Any guesses...

2010-12-03T19:30:00.007-05:00

...as to the most unusual item in my suitcase? I bet none of you have ever packed one. Kudos to the first person to get it right! ;o)

Isn't our new bag cool, too? I thought so! :o)

Well, tomorrow officially starts our vacation and the good food that comes along with it. There is a lot of walking to be done around the parks, too. I hope I don't gain any weight while we are there, or at least no more than a pound or two. I wonder if there is any chance that I could continue to lose weight. Wishful thinking, huh?!? Oh well, there are a few things I am really looking forward to, like the Dole Whip at the Magic Kingdom and the bread pudding at Ohana's and the... oh my, I think I am gaining weight just talking about it. I think I'm in big trouble!

Wish me luck and don't forget to guess what I packed! I'll even be generous and give you a clue. It is square. Hahahahahahaha! ;o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

T minus 24 hours...

2010-12-03T06:18:00.000-05:00

...or so, and we will be in the happiest place on earth! :o)

Hey, can somebody remind me to find the Dopey penny for my friend while I am there? It's the only one she is missing for her collection and the only thing she wants in exchange for house sitting for us. Cheap labor, huh? LOL! :o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Howl!

2010-12-02T07:55:00.005-05:00

Benjamin Henry says good morning in his other language ~ Beagle speak! :o)

He makes me laugh! :o)

Notice what is in Goldie's mouth! She couldn't live without one. ;o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

What I am thinking right now.

2010-11-30T12:27:00.001-05:00

For what it is worth. 'Cause I know y'all are dying to get inside my head! ;o)

I guess it's a good opportunity to give you an update anyway since I have heard some rumblings that people are curious if anything is happening.

I just saw a tweet come through from someone who praised God for being good because of the way He has blessed her family with three children in the last four years. Part of me wants to say "Amen!" and part of me feels like someone socked me in the gut. Don't misunderstand me. I am doing VERY well emotionally and spiritually! It just doesn't go away. It can't. It is part of me, and it always will be regardless of any possible or eventual outcome. It is what God has used to get my attention.

Back to the tweet. It got me thinking. For those of you who don't have a Twitter account, that is a good thing it is used for. To get people to THINK! :o) Whoa. I am WAaaY off track. So, I was thinking. As much as the fruitfulness of this person's family is evidence of the goodness of God, it is not the reason God is good. He just is. It is His character. It is who He is. He IS good, regardless of whether our circumstances makes us feel like it or not.

My initial reaction was also that God is no less good to me than He is for this other person just because God has blessed her with three children while I am still waiting. It's not about what He chooses to do in our lives. It's about who He is... and He is good!

So, that's what I'm thinking right now. I know. Deep, huh? :o)

The update is that there is no update. We are still waiting... daring to hope... and learning to trust.

6 months and 9 days remaining on the contract with our agency.

Thank you for humoring me for a few minutes. :o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Jack attitude! :o)

2010-11-30T06:55:00.002-05:00

Forgive my laziness in not posting Thanksgiving updates or food pictures, but I think you will enjoy this more for now. Also, ignore the nastiness that is our back yard. :o)

The sounds you hear emanating from my little dog are traditional Jack-Russel-speak. :o)

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

On Guard!

2010-11-27T10:27:00.003-05:00

While the LORD rebuilds me, He says I must be on guard!

From that day on, half of my men did the work, while the other half were equipped with spears, shields, bows and armor. The officers posted themselves behind all the people of Judah who were building the wall. Those who carried materials did their work with one hand and held a weapon in the other.

I must be prepared.

Therefore I stationed some of the people behind the lowest points of the wall at the exposed places, posting them by families, with their swords, spears and bows.

I must not be afraid, but I must engage in battle!

After I looked things over, I stood up and said to the nobles, the officials and the rest of the people, "Don't be afraid of them. Remember the Lord, who is great and awesome, and fight for your brothers, your sons and your daughters, your wives and your homes."

I must join God, remembering that it is HE who fights for me!

Wherever you hear the sound of the trumpet, join us there. Our God will fight for us!"

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Thanksgiving ~ Romanian style! :o)

2010-11-24T18:29:00.007-05:00

Y'all can be thankful for your turkey. We will be thankful for our pig! Seriously. I'm okay with turkey, but the hubby ~ like any true Romanian ~ is more a fan of pork. So, that's what we're having! LOL! What tradition breakers are on your Thanksgiving table???

It will be SO nice to have four days off in a row! I am so excited. We are sticking around the house this holiday which is kinda nice and kinda sad. We've been doing so much traveling lately that we thought we would just chill out for awhile. Plus... Disney is coming soon... 10 days to be exact! :o)

I am truly grateful for so many things. My family, my job, my husband, my LORD! Not necessarily in that order. :o) What are you grateful for?

obligatoryquestionthatallbloggersmustaskoftheirreadersatthanksgiving#

:o)

Seriously, though, how has the LORD blessed you this year?

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

For Jessi... :o)

2010-11-23T06:42:00.002-05:00

Recently, Jessi said that y'all needed a new picture of me. I guess so. I really don't think there is a huge difference from the last one. At least not as much of a difference as my actual Before & After picture, but here ya go anyway. Bright and early this morning in my recently acquired new office (cubicle) which, by the way, I LOVE! I know. I'm weird like that, but it is my space. :o)

I DO think that my eyes and my nose look a lot bigger than they used to. LOL! My glasses are waaay big on my face, too. Time to get new ones, I think. I'll have to take a picture of that sometime and see what y'all think. :o)

Have a Happy Tuesday!

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Ashes, brooms, and starting from scratch...

2010-11-22T07:02:00.022-05:00

The LORD gave me a picture the other day of the last many years of my life and why I no longer recognize myself. Actually, it was more a picture of Him than me because I was not physically in the picture. My substance was there, but not in any shape that could be easily identified. I was dust. Ashes. Raw material. A remnant of my former self. It really isn't a bad thing. For God, I think it could be more said: "Good job!" or "Mission accomplished!" Or perhaps, for me, it could be said that I am a "hard nut to crack!" Either way, it has been a hard journey ~ at least for me, and I imagine, it has been for Him, too. Although, I know that nothing is too hard for the LORD! Certainly not dealing with me, and certainly not navigating my circumstances either. Back to the picture. I didn't see His face, but I did see His hands and they were holding a broom, gently sweeping ashes from the ground. Gently sweeping me from the ground. Not as dirt to be discarded. No. Instead, He scooped me into His waiting hands. Then, He said:

And now for a little while grace
has been shown from the Lord our God,
to leave us a remnant to escape,
and to give us a peg in His holy place,
that our God may enlighten our eyes
and give us a measure of revival in our bondage.
For we were slaves. Yet our God
did not forsake us in our bondage;
but He extended mercy to us
in the sight of the kings of Persia,
to revive us, to repair the house of our God,
to rebuild its ruins,
and to give us a wall in Judah and Jerusalem.
(Ezra 6:8-9)

It is a comfortable place to be. Now, I don't really know what to do other than to be still and rest while He breathes new life into me. While He builds and forms the new me and shows me the steps He wants me to take.

I said awhile ago that I needed to step back from our pursuit of adoption, and I have. When I said that, it was because I was focused too intently on my desire for a child and because I was not focused intently enough on my relationship with God. I am at a place now where I am just learning who I am, who God is, and waiting to see what He might do in my life. I guess what I am saying is that you no longer have to avoid the topic of adoption or children with me. I can't really promise any exciting answers, but it is okay to ask. Like I said, I am learning who I am, and I know that neither my existence nor my identity revolve around motherhood. No, for right now, I am a child and a new creation of God. How about you? Who are you? How is the LORD rebuilding you?

By the way, it's nice to meet you... :o)

Embracing His Joy, Hope, & Peace...

A quick hodgepodge...

2010-11-17T06:21:00.002-05:00

I have been sick for the last two days. Sinus yuck. Better now than in 17 days. Yep, only 17 days until Disney!!! I am getting ready to register for my next two grad classes. Actually, I should have already done this, but ya know... procrastination... busyness... registration hiccups. Anywho. These two classes will put me at 30 credits. Halfway! Goodness, this degree takes a good, long time. I have lost a total of 28.7 pounds. Almost 29! Only 5.3 to reach my goal!!! Hmmm... what else? I really wish this cough would go away. Ya know... the annoying you feel better but cough every two seconds and make everyone think you have some horrible disease cough. Yeah, that one. The dogs did enjoy my presence at home for two days. They mostly relaxed so that I could, too.

Can you tell who is in charge? I'll give you a clue. It's not the big dog who moves aside the protective blankets on the couch because she likes to sleep on the actual couch. Nope. Not her. She doesn't think she is a person, either. ;o)

Embracing His Joy, Hope, & Peace...

Perseverance...

2010-11-09T06:51:00.006-05:00

per·se·ver·ance

noun \ˌpər-sə-ˈvir-ən(t)s\

Definition of PERSEVERANCE

: continued effort to do or achieve something despite difficulties, failure, or opposition : the action or condition or an instance of persevering : steadfastness

Whether it is about one's faith or one's journey to lose weight, perseverance is not about where you start. It is about how you FINISH! I am struggling with those last few pounds to reach my (initial) goal weight. I am hungry all the time... and not for good things, either. I've been doing this now almost eight months, and I must admit, I am tired. I have to keep going, though, because I don't want to go back. It is not an option. I finally got back on the treadmill yesterday and this morning because it won't happen if I don't. It isn't the last eight months that count. It is today... and tomorrow... and the day after that.

I kind of feel the same way with our adoption. It is so tempting to just quit and pull out of our contract. What good would that do us, though? It would just sign, seal, and deliver the negative outcome that I fear the most. No, God called us to this. I don't know why, but I trust that He has a reason, so we will persevere until the end... 7 months from yesterday.

Embracing His Joy, Hope, & Peace...

Our duty...

2010-11-02T07:52:00.010-04:00

Have you voted yet today? No? Well then, what are you waiting for? It is our duty as Christians and citizens of this country. As I read from Zephaniah this morning, I could not help but realize that, as a whole, we have "turned back from following the LORD, and have not sought the LORD, nor inquired of Him” (Zephaniah 1:6). How, then, can we expect His blessing on this country? Now, I urge you... seek the LORD... first personally and then, for our country. Then... go vote!!!

Embracing His Joy, Hope, & Peace...

Sunday breakfast conversations in this digital age...

2010-11-01T07:23:00.005-04:00

This was a good weekend. We didn't accomplish all we set out to do, but we did get a lot done. Currently, our refrigerator is stocked with lots of good things to make our dinner preparations easier and faster throughout the week and to keep us more healthy! I thought it was kind of funny that we have a whole tray of cut up veggies just waiting to be devoured. I asked D.T. when we were going to have a party because that is usually the only time I have seen this sort of food. :o) At least we have good snacks ready to keep us from tearing into chips and chocolate the second we walk in the door from work! It's all about planning, isn't it?!?

We got up early yesterday morning and were out the door by 8 a.m. Plenty of time to stop for breakfast before church started at 9:15. After we finished eating, we proceeded to enter our Steel cut oatmeal, Egg beaters, and Bacon (Yum!) on our iPhone Livestrong apps. Then, a funny thing happened. There was an older couple sitting at the table next to us, and the wife spied what we were doing. Our of sheer curiosity and perhaps a bit of disbelief, she spoke up and said to us, "You're not sitting there texting each other, are you???" Hahahahaha! I guess in this digital age that some spouses might use this form of communication when they are sitting right across from each other, but it certainly wasn't us. I just can't stop laughing at her question! So, we chatted a little bit with this couple that we did not know (they were really nice!) and shared with them what we were doing and why. I even got to show them the Before & After picture from my blog as evidence that what we are doing works. The woman had a Droid phone, so I told her where she could get the app, if they were interested, and how much it was. Like I said, it's the best $2.99 I've ever spent!

Hope y'all had a great weekend, too! Ciao for now! :o)

Embracing His Joy, Hope, & Peace...

Journaling...

2010-10-30T08:50:00.005-04:00

I pulled out my old journal this morning,

and discovered that the last time I wrote in it was Saturday, May 28, 2005! 5 1/2 years!!! Wow. I guess I have replaced my private thoughts with this much more public forum. Well, today, I wrote in it, and found that it really is quite different. It is more like a written prayer to God, and I don't need to tell Him what has been happening lately or how I feel about it. He already knows. No, here, I can confess my weaknesses and claim His strength.

Do any of you journal? Not on a blog. In private. What do you like about it?

Embracing His Joy, Hope, & Peace...

A really good afternoon snack!

2010-10-27T11:52:00.000-04:00

I've never really been a raisin kind of girl, so trail mix is hard to come by for me. This, however, is some really good stuff!

I have found a few similar products in the last six months or so. Nuts About Raspberries at Trader Joes and one at Kroger's (I can't remember the name of the product). Give me cranberries or raspberries any day over a raisin! This one I like a whole lot! It's supposedly good for your heart, too. Check it out! :o)

Embracing His Joy, Hope, & Peace...

Unpacking...

2010-10-27T07:31:00.008-04:00

I had to come to work early this morning because D.T. needs the car to go to a dentist appointment to have his crown put in. I don't usually have these extra few minutes to myself before the day starts. I think I will use them to unpack my brain a bit. Come to think of it, my life needs some unpacking, too. Since my class has been over, I have enjoyed not having homework or reading to do. Yet, the other things that I thought would be accomplished still lay there untouched. I am realizing that my problem is not school. Rather, I think that we have too much on our plates, diverting our attention from where our priorities need to be.

What a recipe for exhaustion, anxiety, and Godlessness! Who ever said that the enemy wasn't creative?

I honestly don't know what else to say. My brain just wants to go on hiatus for a little while...

Maybe it is just the fall season. Spring and summer lend themselves to so much excitement and activity. Fall and winter just seem more the time to slow down, curl up with a good book, or take a nap. Speaking of sleep, I can't believe I fell asleep at the end of Biggest Loser last night!

We did make another change to our nighttime routine, though, much to the chagrin of our puppies. We locked the gate. We don't care if they are on our bed any other time, but we sleep so much better if we have all our room. So, they sleep downstairs on the couch with no temptation to climb the steps. Then, in the mornings when we get up, they enjoy a little time to sprawl out. :o)

I haven't lost any more weight recently. I have been able to maintain, though. I really need to ramp up my motivation to reach that last little bit of this goal. Like with everything else in life, I think I am just tired.

Well, I guess that's it for now. Does anybody else feel the need to do some unpacking?

Embracing His Joy, Hope, & Peace...

Ordained...

2010-10-25T07:37:00.002-04:00

This weekend was very special for D.T. (and me :o)) in our journey to serve the LORD...

I am so proud of my husband and his heart of willingness to be used by God to minister to others...

Embracing His Joy, Hope, & Peace...

Weighing my words...

2010-10-22T06:55:00.014-04:00

Alternately titled: Open mouth...insert foot!

Alternately titled: FAITH!

Does anyone besides me have the tendency to just blurt out what they think? I think there are both positives and negatives to doing this. I do realize that it can often be a bad habit, and a lot of times, there are consequences. My ~~only~~ justification is that a.) I am not perfect and b.) I speak the truth.

Yesterday was one of those times that I, unfortunately, regretted what I said. I must interject that I am amazed at some of the paths that God allows me to cross. Seriously, I could not have written this story if I even tried to imagine it. So, here it is (and I am carefully weighing my words this time).

Yesterday, D.T. had the opportunity to meet with some guests to our organization from his home country. They were here, I believe, at the invitation of someone very important in our organization's history. We learned just the night before at a funeral that we were attending that they were coming, and D.T. offered to assist, if necessary. I actually forgot about it until the very end of the day when I began to try to locate D.T. so we could leave. I discovered that he was in another part of the building where I do not generally have access, and he met me at the entrance to let me in. I was introduced to everyone, and handshakes ensued. You know, I bet they all find handshaking a rather strange custom, as in Romania, the greeting is more typically a kiss on each cheek. Anywho. D.T. and I were also speaking with a gentleman and his wife who had their lovely, young daughter with them. D.T. told me that she had been adopted from Romania, and then the gentleman proceeded to share their story with me. It was really quite amazing how God worked to bring their situation to a glorifying conclusion. I should mention here that despite the fact that I knew who brought this group of people and despite the fact that I was introduced to this man and woman by name, the full realization of who they were just did not click with me. Not that it should matter. I mean, if we are willing to say something, we should be willing to say it to anyone. If we shouldn't say something, then we really shouldn't say it to anyone. Right? But... you know.

So, towards the end of our conversation, the gentleman told us just how much his family's faith had increased because of God's working through their daughter's adoption. A great testimony! Then, I felt compelled by our commonality to share briefly with them concerning our experience with adoption and how it has affected my faith. I won't tell you exactly what I said because that would just be repetition of what I shouldn't have said in hindsight. It is safe to say, though, that I spoke out of my pain and frustration and trying to understand what God has for us. I was brief and honest.

The thing for me is that it is so hard to watch the miracles God does for others and wonder, why not us? I don't pretend to understand the mind of God. I want to have faith in what is unseen, but as a human, I feel like I need to see something. I know. That is exactly the opposite of what faith is supposed to be. When does the ending come, though? How long do we wait? More troubling is that a very significant part of me does not want it anymore. The time has passed. It has been too long. For me. I know that God is never late (that feels kind of cliche' to me), yet I feel like He has waited too long for us.

Then, what should my faith look like? I struggle with that. I have always believed that God can act, but not necessarily that He will choose to act in our circumstances. All the evidence leads me to this conclusion. Again, I know this is the opposite of what faith is supposed to be. A song came on the radio recently that spoke to this. Maybe it can say it better than I can because I am struggling for words.

So, is my foot in my mouth again? Do I have egg all over my face? Does anybody have a towel?

Embracing His Joy, Hope, & Peace...

45 days...

2010-10-20T07:10:00.000-04:00

until DISNEY!!! :o)

Embracing His Joy, Hope, & Peace...

Done and relieved...

2010-10-18T07:55:00.001-04:00

Intending to enjoy a break from classes for the next 8 weeks.

Embracing His Joy, Hope, & Peace...

Motivation...

2010-10-15T14:49:00.003-04:00

...not really feelin' much right now. Took the day off from work today to get my final assignment done. Currently, half-way through page 5 of at least 9. Still need to redo the abstract and figure out some way to incorporate enough sources. I only need a 64 on this assignment to get an A for the class. That doesn't provide much motivation!

I WILL be done, though, come Sunday, for sure!!!

Clean house, here I come! :o)

Embracing His Joy, Hope, & Peace...

Almost done...

2010-10-14T07:47:00.001-04:00

I keep trying to post things, but honestly, I have too much else to do.

My class is almost over.

4 more days. ~~2 more weeks. 2 more discussion board replies. 1 (One) 2 more theory critique.~~ One more paper.

I am SO looking forward to a break. So is my house that is sorely in need of cleaning.

Embracing His Joy, Hope, & Peace...

C.C.
**Blogger is not cooperating with me today and will not post my signature. :o(

We rearranged the pantry...

2010-10-07T08:04:00.010-04:00

You would have thought we would have done this a long time ago, but change isn't easy for me. ;o)

We rearranged a few things, threw out a lot of garbage (oops!) and moved around a few shelves, and it gave us room to do this...

The best two things about it are:

1. We now have a shelf to store the Sobe that is
so vital to my weight loss efforts.
It no longer has to reside on my kitchen floor! :o)

2. We now have an actual place to put a garbage can instead of
hanging a bag on one of the cupboard knobs.
That is pitiful, I know... but now it is all in the past! :o)

Does organizing thrill your heart as much as it does mine? :o)

Embracing His Joy, Hope, & Peace...

Wordless Wednesday ~ What happens when I get up from my side of the bed in the AM...

2010-10-06T07:30:00.003-04:00

I am linking up with 5 Minutes for Mom today. Stop over... :o)

Embracing His Joy, Hope, & Peace...

Purpose ~ Destiny...

2010-10-05T11:52:00.003-04:00

I recently received an email from the Women of Faith Blog that I signed up for. The writer on this particular day was Luci Swindoll who I have heard speak many times at Women of Faith conferences. Actually, it was an excerpt from a book she wrote in 2008. You can read it here, if you like.

Following the comments made by Luci, a question was posed for the readers with a place to link up your thoughts. I thought I would join in. So, here goes.

Question:

Do you have a sense of destiny? How does that affect your daily life?

My answer:

I do have a sense of destiny. Yet, to me, it seems to be on hold or unfulfilled. Many years ago, I would have said that my destiny or purpose in life was to be a mother. This is not necessarily so, anymore. Now, I want to say that my destiny or purpose is to help others because of my experiences. Yet, that does not seem right either. I think that the only destiny I could possibly have is to be a child of God in pursuit of His image, to be holy as He is holy, and to love others as He has commanded.

Yes, that is it. To love God and to love others.''

How does it affect my daily life?

The old me would have said that it doesn't. I just go about my daily routine, waiting for the fulfillment of my destiny to happen. Or... it consumes me. I spend every waking moment trying to force it to happen. Neither is the way it is supposed to be, though. He has given me this life and He desires for it to be abundant. Not stagnant, and not frantic. He desires for me to fulfill His plan, His purpose, His destiny for me in His way and in His time.

So, onward I will go, and I will see the fulfillment of my destiny as I go... in every single moment of every single day. In every single interaction. It will not be perfect because I am not perfect. But, it will be beautiful because He is in it with me.

Embracing His Joy, Hope, & Peace...

Just an update...

2010-10-05T07:11:00.003-04:00

I wrote this early this morning in response to an email from a friend...

Sorry I did not respond last night. We did get our report, and I just needed a little time to myself to deal with the emotions. We were presented to two birth mothers. One was interested. One was not. Unfortunately, the one who was interested did not go through with her adoption plan for reasons they cannot share with me. I understand that, although it is still disappointing.

This morning, God reminded me in the book of Jonah that I have no right to be angry. This is His plan, not mine. It is His child, not mine. It is even His birth mother. Not mine to control. Hard words to swallow, but I am trying.

In three days, we will have just 8 months left in the waiting pool. That is two more reports, plus a couple months. Crazy that I calculate my time according to the next report. I don't know where we will be at the end. Part of me thinks that I have no hope, and part of me thinks that I need to believe with everything in me. It is just so hard when all of the evidence is stacked against me. I guess we will see.

So, yes, I am disappointed, but I am trying to trust God.

Embracing His Joy, Hope, & Peace...

Movin' right along...

2010-10-04T05:35:00.005-04:00

2 more weeks. ~~2 more discussion board replies.~~ 1 (One) 2 more theory critiques. One more paper.

The stress is beginning to dissipate. :o)

Gettin' it done...

2010-10-02T10:10:00.001-04:00

Half a ~~One more~~ weekend. 2 more weeks. ~~2 more discussion board replies.~~ 2 more theory critiques. One more paper.

Cholesterol...

2010-10-01T12:31:00.003-04:00

That is a bad word, isn't it? Or, at least, it has become a bad word for some of us. Possibly for the first time in my entire life, I actually initiated and looked forward to having my cholesterol checked yesterday. I made an appointment and saw my doctor for a few minutes. He got to verify for me that while their scale started and stopped on a different number than mine at home, the number of total pounds I have lost matched their records EXACTLY! My weight yesterday was exactly 23.6 pounds less than the last time they weighed me, and that was the number I had, too. Cool! :o)

Anywho.

The reason I made the appointment was because I wanted to see if my cholesterol had come down at all because of my weight loss. Well... guess what??? It did! The dr.'s office was so nice to call me back the same day with the results, and I was thrilled! While my overall number is still high, it did come down four points. Not a ton, but hey, it's something. My LDL (the kind of cholesterol that is supposed to be low, but was too high before) came down 7 points, too. It is still high, as well, but then again, I still have a lot of weight to lose. We talked about that, too. How much weight I should lose. I told him all of the lovely things that people are saying and that everyone thinks I am crazy to want to lose a lot more weight. So, I asked him if my expectations were reasonable, and he said that they were. So, here it is. I want to weigh 120 pounds. Yes, I know!!! That is nuts, right? I need to at least try, though. We'll see what happens.

I shouldn't stop with all that news. There are even better things I found out. For starters, my HDL (the cholesterol that is supposed to be high) went UP 13 points! Now, it is well within the normal range. Woohoo! My ratio between cholesterol and HDL came down a lot, too. It assesses a person's risk for coronary heart disease, and I am now considered normal. Isn't it nice to be normal? :o)

Finally, the best thing of all! At least, I think so! My triglycerides came down a whopping... get ready for this............

61 points!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Can you believe it? Now, that number is well within the normal range again.

So what now? I am going to keep doing what I am doing and then get my levels rechecked in 3 months. I am going to read a book they told me about called The 8-Week Cholesterol Cure. I can't really recommend it because I haven't exactly read it yet, but they said it is helpful. So, we'll see. I have class stuff to finish before I will have the time to devote to reading it. Soon... soon... One more weekend. 2 more weeks. 2 more discussion board replies. 2 more theory critiques. One more paper. Then, I am done and will have a break until January! Phew! More time to devote to raising my HDL with cardio exercise on the treadmill!

I am so happy. :o)

Should I even ask? What is your cholesterol?

Embracing His Joy, Hope, & Peace...

Rain...

2010-09-30T07:39:00.000-04:00

Seemed like a good day to bring this back out again...

Originally posted on May 20, 2008.

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Contemplations

I think twice now, my update tag on Facebook has said that I am "contemplating". Well, if you are still wondering (Goodlet :-) and D.T. :-) :-)), here are the things I have been thinking about. It is amazing to me how many times these last two weeks I have tried to write and rewrite and rewrite these thoughts. I pray God will bring them all together in some coherent manner. Stay with me... I haven't written for a while... this could be long~

Do you like to walk in the rain? If you are anything like me, you don’t. I have never particularly cared to wade through muddy puddles or to take a leisurely stroll while lightning illuminated the sky and the storm clouds poured their cold, wet offering on my head. Faced with a good, long thunderstorm, I am more the type of person to retreat to the warm, safe, lightning-free refuge of my bed and a good movie. In all actuality, I don't even really like showers. I much prefer a long bath in a deep tub, filled with HOT water, and jacuzzi jets (not a reality yet, but hey, a girl can wish). All this would not be complete without a good book, or better yet a conversation with my LORD! Perhaps you disagree (about showers vs. baths, that is), but don't call me crazy. We all have our preferences and I very much enjoy my self-designated prayer tub, um, I mean closet!!

So, what does this all have to do with rain? Well, other than the fact that we all have to get clean in one way or another, there are some very real spiritual applications to be made between rain and suffering. You may have noticed over the years that there are a lot of references to rain (or at least water) in the songs we sing, spiritual or otherwise... "There shall be showers of blessing", "Holy Spirit, Rain Down", "Singing in the Rain". I don't know about that last one - I don't think you will ever find me singing in the rain. How about "Blessed be Your name... where streams of abundance flow". They all sound happy, or at least positive, don't they? Unfortunately, life isn’t always so happy. And the rain isn’t always so pleasant.

Allow me to take you back to a time in my “prayer closet” :-) when God spoke to me and I didn’t really understand the full implications of His words. Numbers 31:23-24 says “…anything else that can withstand fire must be put through the fire, and then it will be clean. But it must also be purified with the water of cleansing. And whatever cannot withstand fire must be put through that water. On the seventh day wash your clothes and you will be clean.” The first time I read this was in 2003, not long before D.T. and I made the move to seminary. At the time, I realized that God intended to take me through a time of purification and cleansing. However, being younger than I am now and having experienced less than I have now, I did not have a clear picture of what that would actually feel like in my life. Initially, the fire sounded like the difficult part and the water sounded gentle and refreshing, even healing. In hindsight, though, as painful as the fire can be, there are times when I wish the rain would just stop – or at least slow down. Have you ever been there? Have you ever wondered when your circumstances would line up with your idea of how they should be? Have you ever wished the sun would peak out through the clouds and make the storms go away? Have you ever wished God would just hurry up and show His purpose through your pain?

It is interesting just how many references there are to rain and water in the Bible… floods, drought, dew. Some are indications of fruitfulness (Acts 14:17), success (Deuteronomy 28:12), provision (Exodus 16:4), abundance (Psalm 68:9), and God's blessing (Hebrews 6:7). Others speak of curse (Genesis 7:4), judgment (Exodus 9:18), futility (Deuteronomy 28:24), and a lack of God's presence (Deuteronomy 11:17). Notice the common thread? It is God who controls the rain, using it for His purpose. What is that purpose? To continue the process of purification? To clean those areas of our lives that can’t withstand the fire? In the end, God promises us that He is fair (Matthew 5:45) and that spring will come (Song of Solomon 2:11-12a).

Then, God is no respecter of persons. The purpose of the rain, or lack thereof, may be different for you than it is for me, but the rain itself does not change. We don't have any control over the fact that it rains, but we can control how we respond to the rain. You see, the rain does something to us. For better or worse, it changes our appearance. It can make us cold and wet or it can wash away our dirt. It changes our perspective. It can cloud our vision, or help us to see things as they really are. It changes our entire being. It can bring fear and destruction or it can bring growth, refreshment, and renewal.

Over the last few weeks, God has allowed me... and probably you too :-)... to witness a lot of literal rain. As He did, He gave me some insights into the way rain can be in our lives. The first happened the night of the seminary banquet when we actually had some tornadoes in the area. While they did not touch down anywhere near where D.T. and I live, the effects were far reaching and intense. The storm was angry and destructive as the winds blew and torrential rains poured from the dark sky. Upon returning home, we sat in the car not wanting to brave the elements, knowing there was no way to escape untouched, even with an umbrella. The only choice we had was to move forward and then to dry off once we got inside. The second happened the night we traveled to the parking lot of a nearby store to meet with a friend. It had been raining off and on for some time, and although it was not causing any damage we could observe, the rain was steady and persistent. We tried to stand outside to have a conversation, but found the cold, damp conditions very distracting and too uncomfortable to tolerate. Eventually, we retreated to the warm, dry, and much more pleasant atmosphere of our vehicle. The third happened a cool, breezy Saturday morning as I took our puppy Ben outside. The rain was easy and cool – quite refreshing, actually. The sun showed through the clouds as the drizzle lightly landed on my face. It was the kind of rain that you could almost see the grass drinking it in and the flowers opening to receive it.

I would like to share one last thought which connects in some way in my mind. Several weeks ago, God drew my attention to Luke 14:25-35, and specifically verse 33 (NAS), which says “So then, none of you can be My disciple who does not give up all his own possessions.” At the time, I was reading the New Living Bible, and the words used in that version spoke directly to some strange circumstances and emotions I had been experiencing. It said, “So no one can become my disciple unless he first sits down and counts his blessings–and then renounces them all for me.” You see, for 11 years – maybe even all my life, I have wanted nothing more than the blessing of being a mother. I believed God promised me that blessing. However, following the adoption training weekend we attended several weeks ago, I had the most unusual feeling (at least to me) that I did not want to have a child at all. It seemed strange first, because I have never had this type of feeling before and second, because we believed God had released us to pursue our family through adoption. Why now would I feel this way? I have shared this with a few people and explained that I don’t believe it is a permanent feeling, but that God is using it at this time for my protection during a waiting period of unknown length or to teach me something. It is interesting that the word used for possessions in the NAS version of verse 33 is the Greek word uparco, which means “being” or “exist”. To some extent, my perspective of being has been entirely wrapped up in the pursuit of becoming a mother. You could say it was my “heart’s desire”. But valid as the desire may be, I can’t let it get in the way of being His disciple. I must be willing to renounce my blessing and follow Him. Unfortunately, on my own, I did not have the strength to put it in the fire. After all, God recognized my desire and promised me its fulfillment, right? True, but not only… He also asked me to do those things that are pleasing in His sight (1 John 3:22)… to give up all my possessions, my desires, my existence, my being – for the sake of following Him. And so, I believe God used the rain – not the angry, destructive rain or the steady, persistent rain, but rather the light and refreshing rain. In quietness, He simply took my desire away, and showed me what it feels like to not need something else more than I need Him.

Embracing His Joy, Hope, & Peace...

Memorial Box Monday Tuesday ~ They held up his arms!

2010-09-28T06:40:00.011-04:00

Welcome to Memorial Box Monday,
as hosted by Linny @ A Place Called Simplicity!

I know it is Tuesday, but Linny did not post before I went to bed last night, and I just saw this early this morning! I've missed doing one of these the last few weeks, and I've been preparing this one for a little while, so here goes... :o)

Exodus 17:12
But Moses' hands were heavy; and they took a stone, and put it under him, and he sat thereon; and Aaron and Hur stayed up his hands, the one on the one side, and the other on the other side; And his hands were steady until the going down of the sun.

Do you know this story? It is the one where the children of Israel are in a fight with the Amalekites. Moses stands on the hill overlooking the battle. As long as he holds his hands up, the children of Israel prevail. But... when he lets his hands down, the tables turn, and the Amalekites prevail. Naturally, though, his arms get tired. So, Aaron and Hur hold up the arms of Moses, one on each side, until the sun goes down and the Amalekites are defeated!

I find two things in the rest of this passage very interesting:

1. end of v. 12 ~
his hands were steady until the going down of the sun.
2. v. 14-16 ~
And Jehovah said unto Moses,
Write this for a memorial in a book,
and rehearse it in the ears of Joshua:
that I will utterly blot out the remembrance
of Amalek from under heaven.
And Moses built an altar,
and called the name of it Jehovah-nissi;
And he said, Jehovah hath sworn:
Jehovah will have war with Amalek
from generation to generation.

Okay, I'll admit... I thought the memorial book reference was cool in light of Linny's Memorial Box posts. It really is scriptural to remember what God has done in your life... to remind you... to teach your children... to encourage others. Beyond that, though, I love that the Scripture notes that Moses' hands were steady as long as they needed to be because others were holding him up.

Throughout my entire battle (yes, it has been a battle) in desiring a child, I have recognized the intercession of others who have prayed for me when I have not known how to pray for myself. There are a handful, in particular, who I know have consistently prayed for me and some who I don't even know about... but somehow, I know they are there. Does that even make sense??? An even smaller number of people are still praying for me, even though I have shared with them where I am. That I recognize this might not be God's plan. That I am at peace with that. Persistent little buggers, aren't they! :o) There are those one or two... maybe even three... who believe God is going to do something incredible in our lives. They are believing for me at a point where I am unable or unwilling to believe for myself. They are holding up my arms. Do you know what that feels like???

This Memorial Box Monday (or Tuesday :o)) I wanted to share with you about one special woman who is believing for me. I met her... ~ooooh, I am SO excited to share this with y'all! I've been saving it for a few weeks now!!!~ I digress. Back to what I was saying. I met her on April 23, 2008 when she found my blog, quite by accident (or not) and felt led to post a comment on the guest book I used to have. She was looking for some statistics about infertility and wanted to encourage me. We chatted back and forth via email and she sent me some material she had produced based on her own experience. I read it, gave her some feedback, and that was that for the most part. She and her husband were then missionaries in Belize and occasionally they would send out an update and we might chat again briefly by email.

Once or twice, I casually mentioned that it would be nice to meet if they ever traveled back this way again. Imagine my surprise when their most recent update told of their plans to finish the work they had been doing and to return to the United States to await the next thing God had for them. Several months ago, they came back to Raleigh, NC... where they were originally from... only a hop, skip, and a jump from where we live! We chatted via email a bit more and arranged to meet one evening for dinner!

It was fabulous! For one thing, we ate at my newest favorite restaurant ~ California Pizza Kitchen! Haven't tried it? You should! :o) Even more than that, though, the fellowship was amazing! Have you ever met those people that you just feel like you have know them your whole life? This was them.

"S" & "R"

They really were incredible. We had so many things in common... places where our stories coincided in a way that only God could have orchestrated. I am excited to see how each of our experiences will glorify God one day! As "S" reminded me that night, God has declared the end from the beginning.

This week, I am opening up my virtual Memorial Box and placing inside a napkin from the California Pizza Kitchen to remind me where our Miracle-working, Mountain-moving, Awe-inspiring, Gasp-giving God joined our hearts with new friends! Is it crazy that I am filling up my Memorial Box with items from restaurants?!?!? Hehehe! :o)

Thank you, "S," for praying and believing for me. Thank you for holding up my arms. I look forward to seeing the end God has had in mind from the beginning of time and this battle.

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Super long time... no see!

2010-09-27T05:27:00.014-04:00

I can't believe how long it has been since I have regularly blogged. Sure, I have posted a little something here and there, but overall, it has not been on my list of top priorities. I've noticed the same thing with some of the bloggers I follow. Perhaps, this thing is dying down a bit?

This current class has really had my full attention, what with all the reading that has had to be done in order to complete the assignments. Some of these books are really life-changing... two things I am learning about myself:

1. I am a people pleaser
2. I am a perfectionist

...and neither one is exactly healthy - emotionally or spiritually. I need to learn how to accept God's strength in my weakness and imperfection and how to set boundaries in my life.

I did discover this last week that I had a few more vacation days available this year that I thought I had already accounted for. So... I took two and got all caught up with my class! Feels good! :o)

***

I am amazed where I am right now in our pursuit to have a child. I guess you really couldn't call it a pursuit anymore. It is more like a ~ if it happens, that would be okay ~ kind of thing. Several months ago, I realized just how much of an idol it had become in my life, and I asked God to please help me to control the overwhelming emotions I had. I've never been the best at controlling my emotions. I don't really know why I should be surprised that He answered my prayer, but He did. The last few months have been filled with few emotions regarding my desire to have a child. It has been nice. Freeing, actually. I have gone back and forth a bunch of times concerning whether or not I think it is a good idea to even move forward at this stage of our lives. I know God is in control, though. Whatever the outcome, HE will do what is best. In the meantime, I am attempting to fill the emotional void I have created in my heart with more of Him. You would think that would be easy, but it is not. It is a discipline.

***

If you happen to think about it today... or the next few days... or the next few weeks... please pray for D.T. He goes to the dentist today at 2 p.m. to have the beginning work for one of his teeth to be crowned. Oh, if that only meant that he was royalty! The one other time he had to have this kind of work done resulted in an incredible amount of pain! Not fun... or convenient considering everything we have going on... ~~right now~~ always! Please pray that God would be merciful to him and alleviate any pain he may have.

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Catching up & quotes that apply...

2010-09-20T07:45:00.005-04:00

I have be so incredibly busy the last little while. The class I am currently in has really kept me hoppin'! I grew up loving to read and write, but this one is really stretching my limits. I have a book to read and a theory critique to write every week, along with discussion boards and a significant paper. I feel like I am perpetually running at full speed a few steps behind the bus, and I wonder if I will ever catch up! I'll get through it, but I suspect that I will be exhausted by the time it is over and sorely in need of a break. I think I am going to drop the class I am registered for in the next 8-week term so that I can actually enjoy preparing for Christmas.

Some of the books I have had to read lead me to believe that the authors are out of their minds and really don't have clue. Well, at least one of the books, anyway. The idea behind this class is to examine all the available Christian theories out there and to decide what you can (or cannot, in some cases) glean from each one. The current book that I am reading is really good, and I thought that I would share one quote that I found particularly poignant. Take it for what it's worth. Maybe it will apply to you as well.

"We must let Jesus pilot our lives before we can ask Him to power our changing. He won't barge in and take over, but He enters when invited. Of course, we have to own our responsibilities in the injury-recovery, healing-from-hurts changing process. But, just as there is an unseen, inner energy at work in physical healing and change, God's unseen Spirit energizes our emotional/spiritual changing processes when we let Him. As we do our part, God does His 'inside job' to create
change of eternal significance."
- - - Sandra D. Wilson, Ph.D., Hurt People Hurt People

Isn't that SO true?!?! I imagine that we all have some changes that are needed in our lives. Thoughts. Attitudes. Behaviors. Relationships. Of course, God desires to help us with those changes, but we must be willing to first invite Him to take the control of our lives out of our hands and place it in His sufficiently capable hands. Change is not easy, but praise God that we have His Holy Spirit to guide us through the process and to give us the energy we need to get through to the other side. How about you? Could you use some energy to make the necessary changes in your life?

Well, enough about that for now. It is time for work. I pray y'all have a blessed day.

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Return to Me!

2010-09-14T07:40:00.008-04:00

Speaking of the children of Israel...

Amos 4

1 Hear this word, you cows of Bashan on Mount Samaria, you women who oppress the poor and crush the needy and say to your husbands, "Bring us some drinks!" 2 The Sovereign LORD has sworn by His holiness: "The time will surely come when you will be taken away with hooks, the last of you with fishhooks. 3 You will each go straight out through breaks in the wall, and you will be cast out toward Harmon, " declares the LORD. 4 "Go to Bethel and sin; go to Gilgal and sin yet more. Bring your sacrifices every morning, your tithes every three years. 5 Burn leavened bread as a thank offering and brag about your freewill offerings-- boast about them, you Israelites, for this is what you love to do," declares the Sovereign LORD. 6 "I gave you empty stomachs in every city and lack of bread in every town, yet you have not returned to me," declares the LORD. 7 "I also withheld rain from you when the harvest was still three months away. I sent rain on one town, but withheld it from another. One field had rain; another had none and dried up. 8 People staggered from town to town for water but did not get enough to drink, yet you have not returned to Me," declares the LORD. 9 "Many times I struck your gardens and vineyards, I struck them with blight and mildew. Locusts devoured your fig and olive trees, yet you have not returned to me," declares the LORD. 10 "I sent plagues among you as I did to Egypt. I killed your young men with the sword, along with your captured horses. I filled your nostrils with the stench of your camps, yet you have not returned to Me," declares the LORD. 11 "I overthrew some of you as I overthrew Sodom and Gomorrah. You were like a burning stick snatched from the fire, yet you have not returned to Me," declares the LORD. 12 "Therefore this is what I will do to you, Israel, and because I will do this to you, prepare to meet your God, O Israel." 13 He who forms the mountains, creates the wind, and reveals his thoughts to man, he who turns dawn to darkness, and treads the high places of the earth-- the LORD God Almighty is his name.

What might the LORD be withholding from you? Do you need to RETURN to the LORD God Almighty? I know I do.

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Faith...

2010-09-08T12:37:00.003-04:00

I pray that I might have even a small portion of this kind of spirit and determination. She just doesn't let her circumstances get her down.

We really can learn a lot from animals, can't we?

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

OBESE

2010-09-07T12:52:00.029-04:00

September 3, 2010 marked a milestone for me in my weight loss journey. I stepped on my Wii Fit scale, and the level of my body mass index rose and stopped just short of the mark for obesity.

It seems like I've been waiting for this forever! For the longest time, it seemed so far away. A BMI of 30 is considered obese, and I started out with a BMI of 34. Now, while I still have a long way to go, I am no longer obese - just overweight. I can't wait to get to a BMI of 24, which is considered healthy. Curious? Go ahead... click on one of the links. The first one will tell you what your BMI is. The second one will tell you what you will weigh at a particular BMI. What should your target weight be to be healthy?

Many of you have offered your congratulations, and that is nice. Still, many others have asked how did you do it or how can you be so motivated? Well, that is even nicer, because as I look around me, so many people are in the same boat that I was in. Some, dangerously so. I would like nothing more than to know that someone else might be motivated to start losing weight because they saw that I was able to do it. Oh, and by the way, I am definitely not there yet. I know that if I am not careful, I can easily find myself right back where I started.

So, here it is. How I ~~did it~~ am doing it. It's not rocket science. The equation is as simple as this:

Calories In
less than
Calories Out

Period. Eat less. Exercise more. Of course, you can't eat too little or your body will think you are starving it and shut down all your weight loss efforts. Still, the general rule applies.

A few other things have been helpful to me, as well.

1. I always take these...

...and never take this.

3. I remind myself to move throughout the day as much as I can by tracking these...

Great iPhone app, by the way. You should try it if you have one... an iPhone, that is. :o)

4. Increase your fiber and protein intake. Lower your fat, calorie, and sodium intake. That may mean decreasing how much bread and pasta you eat, or changing the type of bread and pasta you eat. There are alternatives, but a piece of 120 calorie white bread just doesn't do it for me. It just wastes my calories and leaves me hungry. Steel-cut oatmeal or whole wheat pasta just make more sense. I think I've eaten one of these, along with some low-fat, less sugary yogurt for breakfast just about every morning for the last 5 months. It works. Oh, and by the way, a helpful tip... this is one of the best yogurt choices I have found at the store. 12 grams of protein and only 80 calories and 1.5 grams of fat! Only 4 carbs, one of which is fiber! Seriously! If you have a Kroger's, try it. :o)

5. Weigh (and/or measure) your food. I promise you don't realize how much you are eating. This makes sure you do.

6. Keep track! This one might just be my favorite.

I really owe all my weight loss to this program. It is very easy to use, and it keeps it in front of you. On your mind. Give it a try online, and then download the app for your iPhone so you can take it with you! Their database of food and restaurants is AMAZING!!! It will even sync your data between the online version and your iPhone so you always know right where you are. It is the best $2.99 I've ever spent in my life, and much cheaper than the dues you would pay for a weekly weight loss group. They even have a really good community for support.

Motivation?

Well, that has to be your own. Watching programs like Losing It With Jillian really makes me feel like, if they can do it, then so can I. Seeing a bit of progress, and then looking back really motivates me! I guess the bottom line is, you just have to see the value and then just do it. What do you find valuable? A new wardrobe? Feeling better about yourself? A lower cholesterol number at the doctor's office? The ability to sleep better at night? More energy to play with your children? More years with your spouse? I don't know about you, but it is worth more than the candy bar or french fries to me.

Well, I guess that's about it. I don't know if any of this will help anyone or not, but I hope so. Just give it a try. Make one small change at a time. It will work!

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

Lessons in dog walking...

2010-09-03T20:40:00.002-04:00

I was hoping to share some good weight loss news with you this evening, but apparently God has other plans because there is something else He wants me to say. I really need to be doing my discussion board and a paper that is due this Sunday, but I have to get this out.

It is 8:40 p.m., and I just returned from taking the dogs for a walk. Separately. D.T. and I have an agreement. He cooks supper, and I walk the dogs. You see, he just doesn't enjoy the task of walking them because they are pullers, which makes for a most unpleasant experience. I don't have a problem with it, though, because I really don't like to cook. So, the arrangement works for us, as long as I don't walk them together. That, I could not handle, but hey, I need the burned calories from a double walk, anyway.

Tonight, however, was entirely different. The dogs usually aren't that bad for me. A few minutes of pulling, and they typically relax into an enjoyable pace for everyone. Like I said, though, that was not the case this evening. From the first step out the door until we got back, this was probably the worst walk I have ever been on. Ever. Goldie did pretty well, but Ben was HORRIBLE! I thought he was going to rip my arm off. My hand was sore from the leash that was wrapped around it, cutting off the circulation every time he would put his nose to the ground (which was at least every 3 seconds) or lunge at some random leaf. 30 seconds into the walk, I told him that this was going to be a short walk if he kept acting like this. Like he could understand me, or something. On we went. I figured he had to give in eventually.

Not even two minutes later, I figured that I might as well use our walking time to pray, if I could even concentrate enough to think. Immediately, I sensed God speak to me. "You are like him," and I knew exactly what He meant. He was right. I am just like him. I am excited to be going for a walk, and I want to explore every single option along the way. I don't want to go where He is leading. I want to go the direction I want to go. I don't want to go the pace that He is walking. I want to go at my own speed... faster! I don't pay a bit of attention to the car He hears coming behind us or the car He sees turning out of the parking lot in front of us. I'm too busy smelling the ground, chasing leaves, and barking at other dogs I would like to be playing with. I don't realize that the walk would be so much more enjoyable if I just fell into step with my Leader.

I'm not even sure what that looks like, but I want to know. I don't want to pull God's arm off.

I guess I just need to ask Him which way we are walking today. Or, better yet, just walk...

That's all.

Living in His JOY, HOPE, and PEACE...

His Heart

Singing with Daddy!

"Not Me! Monday!" Returns!!!

GROWL!!! ;o)

Spin!

Rolling over ~ Part Deux! ;o)

Squeal! ;o)

Peek-A-Boo!

Pink Panther Laughter!

Teething & Talking...

Got milk?

iPhones and Blessings!

A Laugh? or a Hiccup? ;o)

Being Selective...

Never say never...

Sleep!

Smile!

Daddy's Little Soccer Player! :o)

It's a lip, lip, lip! ;o)

The 1st Three Months!

Where it all fits.

Pooh...

Does it work???

Long time, no chat...

Hiccups!

It's not possible, is it???

About ME!

For Susan A....

Update from our agency...

Welcome to the bloggy world!

I did it!!! :o)

My most searched post...

Encouragement...

12... 11... 10...

Siblings!

Things I love...

The most important tool!!!!!

Piano...

Cry...

Daddy & Me! :o)

From theory to FAITH!

Testing Reveals Your Heart

Moving on...

Sweet chocolate dreams...

Inching closer...

Headless dog!

Spring!

God is über-Good!

Thirst...

I found it!!! :o)

What did we ever do before cell phones???

Things that make me smile...

The WINTER of my life...

Encouragement...

Glorious Day!

1.1.11

HOPE personified...

Merry CHRISTmas...

Double Dose: an eventful anniversary!

Ouch!

*Us*

Wow!

Snowy Afternoon!

It's about time, C.C.!!!

Meet the new C.C. & D.T.!

Any guesses...

T minus 24 hours...

Howl!

What I am thinking right now.

Jack attitude! :o)

On Guard!

Thanksgiving ~ Romanian style! :o)

For Jessi... :o)

Ashes, brooms, and starting from scratch...

A quick hodgepodge...

Perseverance...

per·se·ver·ance

Definition of PERSEVERANCE

Our duty...

Sunday breakfast conversations in this digital age...

Us